BartCop.com Volume 2077 - Death Cab For Rudy In Today's Tequila Treehouse...

	WaHoPo's Obama Bigotry
	Rudy's ho's Cop Cab
	Does Leahy have Bite?
	Is Bush Stupid
	Sex w/ Jesus's Wife?
	How gay is Trent Lott?
	Biden's wild-ass threats
	Power to the People?
	Kate Beckinsale's Mouth

Paul Krugman, The New York Times, November 30, 2007 From the beginning, advocates of universal health care were troubled by the incompleteness of Barack Obama's plan, which unlike those of his Democratic rivals wouldn't cover everyone. But they were willing to cut Mr. Obama slack on the issue, assuming that in the end he would do the right thing. Now, however, Mr. Obama is claiming that his plan's weakness is actually a strength. What's more, he's doing the same thing in the health care debate he did when claiming that Social Security faces a "crisis" - attacking his rivals by echoing right-wing talking points. The central question is whether there should be a health insurance "mandate" - a requirement that everyone sign up for health insurance, even if they don't think they need it. The Edwards and Clinton plans have mandates; the Obama plan has one for children, but not for adults. Why have a mandate? The whole point of a universal health insurance system is that everyone pays in, even if they're currently healthy, and in return everyone has insurance coverage if and when they need it. And it's not just a matter of principle. As a practical matter, letting people opt out if they don't feel like buying insurance would make insurance substantially more expensive for everyone else. Read More Here

A man claiming to have a bomb walked in to Hillary Rodham Clinton's campaign offices Friday and took hostages, police and witnesses said. The man had what appeared to be a bomb strapped to himself, said Bill Shaheen, a top state campaign official. He took two hostages, both volunteers, and released others, Shaheen said. Witness Lettie Tzizik told television station WMUR of Manchester that she spoke to a woman shortly after she was released from the office by the suspect. The woman was carrying an infant, and crying. "She said, 'You need to call 911. A man has just walked into the Clinton office, opened his coat and showed us a bomb strapped to his chest with duct tape," Tzizik said. Clinton was not in the New Hampshire office Friday. She was scheduled to give an address at the Democratic National Committee meeting in Vienna, Va., but it was unclear if the address would go forward as planned. Authorities were sending a tactical bomb unit to assist local police, and the area was evacuated, said Maj. Michael Hambrook of New Hampshire State Police. A nearby school also was in lockdown. The Clinton office is located in the downtown area in a strip of several storefronts. Workers for Sen. Barack Obama's campaign office in Rochester also were evacuated, a campaign spokesman said. The office is four doors away from Clinton's. Staffers in John Edwards' office, a few buildings away, evacuated as well.

The Luck of the Irish? “Ireland: home of the blarney and the brave.” How do they know this was a man and not a leprechaun? HERE’S something at the end of the rainbow worth finding!

National police said a lone man drove into the brewery - a Dublin landmark and top tourist attraction - on Wednesday and hitched his truck to a fully loaded trailer awaiting delivery to city pubs.

And, now, on to our main attraction…

The POWER of the Farce

What follows is what happened during the first dry run of yet another script spewed out louder and smellier than yesterday’s 100 quart bean binge: gas passed out of the very bowels of Hell… written by three spook script writers: the morally dead ghost of O’Lielly, the more mentally emptied than Dagger of the Mind’s Dr. Adams: Michelle Malkin, and the intellectually rigor mortis-cized Savage. As always they give truth the finger by attempting to place spin so frighteningly absurd into the script that such lies could scare the Dickens out of Dickens, make Jacob Marley poop his ghostly drawers and drive the Ghostbusters to head for the hills… (Complete with Scribe’s notes about the actors latest attempt to read the damn thing and the actual, true, quotes no one who directed or wrote this atrocity wanted us to know: what was actually SAID. Casting by Rabid Karl Rove and Lush Dimbulb) Darth Vader- O’Bama Princess Whowouldwannalayaher?- Ann Cunter Lukewarm Skywalker- Ruditoot-toot Jewels-iani Handjob Solo- John (”I act like my last name is ‘McClain’”) McCain The Emperor with Too Many DAMN Clothes On- Hillary Clinton Chewy- Ron Paul (with Dennis Kucinch as his stunt double because NO ONE is going to listen to EITHER of them.) …and featuring Ben ah Full ah Sheisen Stein as RU?METOO! and Dennis he’s so boring he’s a menace Miller as EasytoSEEThroughhisBS/po. Directing Ari Fleischer , Tony Snowup your… job, Too Much Reich Wing Poisoned Cappuccino, no relation to Dan Marino, Perino… (Scribe would add “she speaks fast and says nothing,” but… who doesn’t know THAT?) A Rupert, not “Holmes but Murdoch,” production. Perino: Places everyone we’re reading select lines out of order: with no logic or common sense as to why. Did you expect something else? Give it up people it’s been seven years! Now… action… Darth O’Bama-

“I think that nobody wants to play chicken with our troops on the ground,” said Obama. “I do think a majority of the Senate has now expressed the belief that we need to change course in Iraq.”

Perino- Now you know Barack what you are suppose to say was, “I want to play chicken with our troops.” You know, you’re suppose to represent the “darkie side of the force.” We’ll just get our talking head and media shills to alter that. Next line… The Emperor with TOO Many Clothes On (Or what “hat” will Hillary wear today?-

“Well, some say free markets can be destructive.”

Perino, Damn it people! Now we’ll have to change that one too. Here’s the line you were suppose to say that everyone will think you said… “Free markets are the most destructive force in modern America.” Honestly, Hill, when are you going to learn to say what our benefactor is going to say you said?? Keep on script people! Hillary- I don’t know how to respond to that. Guess I’ll go change my clothes again: put on a another hat, and then kind of, sort of, partially decide… for now. Perino-OK, Princess, your turn to… (Cunter cuts her off AS SHE DOES EVERYONE.) Princess- [Clinton] masturbates in the sinks. God gave us the earth. We have dominion over the plants, the animals, the trees. God said, “Earth is yours. Take it. Rape it. It’s yours.” If you don’t hate Clinton and the people who labored to keep him in office, you don’t love your country… Perino- Now that’s what we’re talking about people that’s representing the “GOOD,” American, patriotic, wholesome side of the farce! “Luke” Rudy?

Freedom is about authority. Freedom is about the willingness of every single human being to cede to lawful authority a great deal of discretion about what you do.

Perino- Wow how presidential! What a winner! How well you’ll continue the Junior legacy! Now THAT’S script reading people. Why can’t you wrap you’re heads around how we have to give up freedom to fight for… Hillary- (mutters to herself) Now I have to go change again and find another hat to answer that one, damn it. Perino: Handjob McCain, your turn… (McCain: dressed in a bullet proof vest, helicopter/gunships overhead, just back from just such a “safe” walk Iraq.)

There are neighborhoods in Baghdad where you and I could walk through those neighborhoods, today.

Perino… people now that’s the best masterful performance and on talking point show of stupid bravado I’ve ever heard. Soon, after 08, we’ll have all of America walking without protection. Then when we will re-release The Power of the Farce on the gullible masses. Be back here at 7am for another read through please and… (zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz… oops, Scribe fell asleep there for what seemed like an eternity but was just a few seconds…) This reading was brought to you by Diebold: as committed to helping the American dream foolishly die bold in 08 as we were to giving Junior Ohio in 04. And yet another Neo Con rerelease: Freakies…. and you thought the concept behind the 70s cereal was thought up by drug addled idiots? Now with even more partisan talking point; Crack-like, addictions.

As Hillary Clinton slides in Iowa polls more accusations have surfaced about the Clinton campaign’s attempts to control caucuses and debates. The freshest accusations are related to Saturday night’s Brown and Black Presidential Forum. Several people that have been involved in the past with the Forum but were not invited to participate this year have made allegations that the co-chairs of the event, Wayne Ford and Mary Campos are Clinton supporters and are working to ensure that the event is full of supporters of her campaign. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/chase-martyn/accusations-that-clinton-_b_74729.html

Robert Scheer, TruthDig, November 27, 2007 It was a very good week for Saudi Arabia. The royal family's favored Pakistani "president-in-exile," Nawaz Sharif, returned in a triumphant homecoming, throwing down a major challenge to the rule of Gen. Pervez Musharraf, who's still favored, for the moment, by the United States. Although Sharif can claim to be the true pro-democracy choice, given that he was deposed as prime minister by Musharraf's 1999 military coup, the U.S. is hoping to throw the deeply corrupt but Westernized Benazir Bhutto into the mix out of fear that Sharif is soft on Muslim fanatics in his own country as well as on the Taliban. Those fears are well founded, given that Sharif, inspired by Saudi-style Wahhabism, attempted to introduce sharia, Islamic law, in his last years in office. It was his administration that green-lighted the test of the Muslim nuclear bomb and condoned bomb builder A.Q. Khan's nuclear proliferation efforts, which aided the nuclear weapons programs of North Korea, Libya and Iran. Finally, it was Sharif who strongly supported the Taliban, sponsors of Osama bin Laden, in securing power in Afghanistan. Now, to be fair, Musharraf and Bhutto also favored Pakistan's nuclear program and actively supported the Taliban. I am not referring to the fact that Pakistan, Saudi Arabia and the United Arab Emirates were the only countries to extend full diplomatic recognition to the Taliban. No, Pakistan's sponsorship of the Taliban, under all three leaders, goes far deeper than that, as revealed by the release in August of declassified portions of seven years' worth of cable traffic between the U.S. State Department and its embassy in Pakistan. As the National Security Archive, based at George Washington University, summarized the new information, "The declassified U.S. documents ... clearly illustrate that the Taliban was directly funded, armed and advised by Islamabad itself ... including the use of Pakistani troops to train and fight alongside the Taliban inside Afghanistan." Read More Here

It was inevitable that Rudy and Mitt would start snarling at each other like two starved pitbulls chained up in the yard overnight and the Bile Factory has been cranking overtime as Giuliani tried to 'Willie Horton' Romney by accusing him of appointing a 'liberal' judge that let a guy out of jail who later committed murder, and the Mittster snapped back that Mayor Il Duce is no solid Republican family man, considering how many times he's been married to hookers he casually picked up in Times Square. At the last GOP debate they brandished daggers, even over the New York Yankees; no fatal thrusts, but each one was bleeding from shallow cuts. Rudy is showing the hot breath of desperation here; he was trying to run an 'ignore the small change' campaign and beat up on Hillary, as if he were already the nominee, but he's losing badly in Iowa and New Hampshire; his staff is now even having trouble herding the deluded into his soporific speeches. ("I just came in for the free donuts.") Romney's still polling ahead in both states, but his support is seriously eroding with Christopublicans as they discover bright, shiny religious fanatic Mike Huckabee, weird Chuck Norris ads and all. Besides, I have a feeling regular folks on the campaign trail only slap Mitt on the back to make sure he doesn't have a key there; at least Huckabee appears to be a warm-blooded mammal, descended from apes or not. After all these months of campaigning, Romney's still a flip-flopping drone who doesn't connect well with Republican audiences; a watercress sandwich with the crust cut off, too bland even for the GOP faithful. His personal fortune, and his behind-the-scenes Bush family backing, are the only things keeping him in the race thus far. Meanwhile, Rudy can barely fill a coffee shop with his supporters and, like the winter weather that is descending on Corndog Country and the Live Free or Die Laughing states, he is a refreshing change at first, and then merely tedious and annoying. Soon, his dwindling audiences will remember to bring shovels, but not for the snow. Bernie Kerik's BFF is also about to be slapped by another problem -- a very well-funded media campaign by the NYC firefighters bringing down to Ground Zero-rubble Rudy's claims of heroics and leadership on 9/11 that will be pretty hard for the GOP primary voters to ignore. And the sleaze continues to ooze out regarding Mayor Medici's misuse of city funds, especially those earmarked for the handicapped and housing. Aside from that, he's still nominally a liberal on social issues, although his recent bughouse comments about voting for McGovern in 1972 when he thought Nixon would be the better president -- especially considering what happened after Dick was reelected -- served only to make him look pretty damned stupid. As presidential fodder, Benito is entering the last act of one of those operas he craved in high school; one where the hero tragically dies of self-inflicted wounds. One more negative: Look at Rudy in profile -- with his bald pate and hair plumped up in back, doesn't he remind you of Dracula from Francis Coppola's film? No wonder mothers hold their children tightly in the presence of the Artless Dodger from Flatbush. Over in far right field, John McCain has become a laughable woo-hoo who is backing a war and a president even many Republicans don't favor and has made a career of pretty much offending every group in the GOP at one time or another. Blinky looks old, weary and distracted, as if he doesn't believe in his candidacy himself, and what GOP voter wants a president who denigrated religious nuts six years ago and then courted them in 2007? 'Raw Ambition' is effectively stamped on his forehead and he is trusted by no one. He also can't handle money; look at the millions that poured out of his pockets to Rovian 'consultants' to cinch the lead spots for Giuliani and Romney. Besides, 'Twitartha' Chris Matthews likes him, which automatically condemns McCain to the junk heap -- everyone Spit-Machine Matthews lauds always slides to the bottom, it's kind of like the old Sports Illustrated cover curse. Did someone say 'Fred'? TV's Arthur Branch is off making notes for his forthcoming book "The Man Who Wasn't There," a diary of a short, miserable political campaign that failed. Reporters idly track the yawns at his speeches to entertain themselves the way kids used to count license plates on long family road trips; I mean, the man has to beg for polite applause from Mayberry-nice Iowans! That sound you hear is the flutter of resumes flowing out from his campaign staff. The Thompson balloon is just about to pop, but it's so deflated and fatigued few will notice when it does. Those Republicans who counted on Thompson to fill Reagan's shoes might as well dig up the embalmed remains of the original; at this point, he'd get more votes than Fred. Back in Hollywood by the end of January. Meantime, Ron Paul is clipping along, raising money and the hackles of the GOP elite. Though dubbed unelectable by the Washington Punditrocracy, and therefore mostly ignored, out on the streets he's firing up the GOP hoi polloi and engendering enough concern to warrant an attack by Republican-establishment courtesan Mona Charen, fresh from her fax machine with the direct line to RNC HQ. She, naturally, walloped him as a racist Nazi kook, but that doesn't seem to matter to his devoted supporters, most of them, unlike the enervated GOP as a whole, young and energetic enough to get out and vote. He will surprise in the early primaries. And let's not even waste time with the coach-class vanity candidacies of Tom Tancredo and Duncan Hunter -- no one can find their supporters, least of all themselves, and both may very well lose their Congressional seats in the rising Blue Tide of the next election. That chilling thought by itself will send them scurrying back to their home districts by February. That leaves former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee, who is benefiting greatly from the Rudy/Mitt knife fight and recent increased attention from the media as his numbers click up. With Rudy's 'electability' joining the alligators in the NYC sewers; white bread Mitt nothing but a dull butterknife; McCain a passenger on a dead-end streetcar named Desire, and friendly Fred collapsing into a bag of wrinkled wind, who's left except consistently-Christopublican Huckabee and mostly Libertarian Ron Paul? If I had to call it now, I'd say Iowa: Romney, Huckabee, Paul; and NH: Huckabee, Paul, Romney. Unless, of course, the votes are not honestly counted, always a distinct possibility when Republicans are involved.