Speculative Friction
“Taking actual events and mining them just to provide that special itch that irrational Reich Wingers can’t scratch.”
Actual event (Thanks to News of the Weird)
Buy ultram online without prescription, “The Nebraska legislature’s new ’safe haven” law for unwanted babies, like other state laws allows them to be dropped off anonymously at hospitals to discourage abortions (and neglect by unfit parents). However, unlike other states’ laws, Purchase ultram without prescription, Nebraska’s applies not just to infants, but “minors” because, said Senator Tom White, “All children deserve our protection.” In September the first two non-infants were abandoned, purchase ultram overnight delivery, as exasperated parents gave up on rebellious sons aged 11 and 15, and critics say the law could apply to those up to age 19.”
Speculation…
The Palin girl put down her bags and sighed. Buy ultram from canada, “Pregnant again.” The nurse said, “Don’t worry honey, your mother was given up and lived here too.”
“Really?”
“Yes, dear, order ultram cheap online, and it appears we should never have let her go. We’ve had a lot of infamous children here.”
“Like who?”
“Well, Buy ultram us, there was Crankypants McSame who looked old at 10 and always yelled ‘get off my lawn’ out the window at no one, really.”
“And…”
“Every talk show host on Reich Wing radio. Dimbulb damn near ate us out of business. Handjob Hannity has always been a egomaniac, small minded, twerp… even back then, buy ultram online without prescription. Michael So Savage (with a lisp) has always been nothing but a big Weiner who would beat up a baby for fun and that room…”
“Why it’s got rubber walls, order ultram without prescription, bite marks and blood everywhere!”
“Yes, that’s where we held Biggus Dickus after we cleaned up the fecal matter strewn all over it by it’s former resident, Order no rx ultram, Junior.”
“The President was here?”
“Yeah, our biggest failure has now qualified as the biggest failure in human history. We had to let him go wild. He lived on the street and ate puppies and kittens; tried to ‘comb’ his hair with locusts.”
“But why did you have to let him go?”
“Because no one with any common sense is stupid enough to go anywhere near a homicidal, find cheap ultram, ignorant, smug, Order ultram from canada, smirky egomaniac who claims God tells him to act that way.”
“Anyone else?”
“Many, but if you want to get along here, don’t mention Junior’s mother.”
“Why.”
“It was like having a real stinky monster under our beds, only uglier, ultram online stores, nastier, bigger forked tongue, Order ultram in us, smellier and, oh we were so glad when Junior’s father ‘adopted’ her. Just wish we had given her her rabies shots before she got out.”
Scribe’s Curious Question of the Week
“Questioning what others rarely dare to.”
“Why is it that if racist animals could join the KKK, most of them would be dogs?”
Ye Olde Scribe Productions Presents: A “Pleasant” Afternoon’s Drive with Moosemeat Mama
Ye Olde Scribe’s spy-flies on the wall have been off the wall for a while… would you expect anything else than “off the wall?” It’s been a busy season, cheap ultram from usa. Buy ultram online without prescription, So many windshields to splatter. So many birds to avoid giving really bad indigestion to. And so many calls to intercept. Buy ultram overnight delivery, One of Scribe’s spies was flying over the Moosemeat Mama’s limo and intercepted the following phone call to a fellow ditz in Alaska:
(Sound of “talk” like adults talk in Peanuts.)
Yeah, I’m drivin and talking ta ya, Liz. Me, find cheap ultram online, the soon ta be VP by gosh by gollywads, will be drivin da nation soon. Dey wanted some crappy elitist “chauffeur” to do it, but I show dem what ta show fur…, buy ultram online without prescription. Ultram free delivery, ha, ha… I kill myself. (smile and a wink) Wadda ya mean some people wish I would. Oh, certified ultram, I get it. (She obviously doesn’t) “Chauffeur?” Sounds like some pansyass Frenchie ding to me, Ultram from india, you know… the ones I see just beyond Putkin-y-kinkin in Moscow owt my bacKdoor. Buy ultram online without prescription, Oops, der there goes anodur kitten crossin da road. Der, got it. Oh by bolybumkins, cheap ultram pill, dis is so exciting, like hunting, Lowest price for ultram, only with a limo. Heli-e-copting wolves ain’t got nothing on dis. (wink) Mr. Secret Service man, can you get one of you’re fellow hunks ta pick up dat puppy and add it ta my hubbie’s “Achilles kills me” brand roadkill cooler, buy ultram online without prescription. (smile and a wink)
(Sound of screaming,
ultram buy online. More sound of “talk” like adults talk in
Peanuts.)
Oh, youse right, Ultram non prescription, sweetiekums, I thought dese SS men were supposed ta be sooooooo virile. (Winks then whispers….) They’re wooooooosies. Well Liz, cheapest generic ultram, what did ya think of dat Dahbate. Buy ultram online without prescription, Oops, I dropped mi lipstick again…
(More sound of “talk” like adults talk in
Peanuts, more screams: sound of doors starting to open.)
OK, OK. I’m pro-Life and I just ran over a baby carriage, Ultram pharmacy, don’t you lecture ME, Mr. SS man. We’re in a blue state, canada ultram. It’s not like der human, or der going be allowed ta vote for me, Ultram online review, or anything like dat. It’s not like they have rights or sumthin, buy ultram online without prescription. Aven’t you heard of a leaders right ta do damn near anyting ta da little people. No. What, ultram cheap, never erd of Haveus a Corpsus. Give us the right to kill anything or anyone. Buy ultram online without prescription, Geesh, go back to Secret Service school and learn somedin why doncha. Buy discount ultram, Now get on your headset thingies there and have some black sooties add dat baby to the coolers too. (Wink then whisper.) Yeah, Lizzikins, I’m sure I’ll convince dese nits I’m just like them… (Louder) Golly willikers, buying generic ultram, Mr. Secret Service man, Buy no rx ultram, I’m on da phone, don’t interrupt me, I’ll forget my talking points I’m tryin ta memorize. No, ultram rx, I don’t care ta “learn” how this round wheelie thing in front of me “works.” If it’s not working right we just gotta “fix” OK. Oh, now someun else is calling, buy ultram online without prescription. I’m sorry, Ultram no online prescription, Liz, incoming…
Mom, I’m pregnant again.
Yopugodamnmodurfuckinlittleslut, cancha keep your legs closed fur five seconds, discount ultram online, or go off and have it sump pumped out without tellin me or someding. Couldn’t ya jump up and down to shake da little wiggles out of ya like I told ya ta do. Ultram in australia, Just go get the huge dirty plunger from da outhouse for suckin out the overspill, for criminy bimini’s sake I’m tryin ta do an election here. You’ll hafta tell Daddy when ya see im.
When he sneaks into my beds late at night. It is HIS baby….
Buy ultram online without prescription, Oh, now ya sound like one of dose whiney liberals. Well, ultram in malaysia, like Daddy at night, change is cuming. Buy cheapest ultram on line, (giggle and a snort) We’ll talk when I get home and, no, I don’t know when, and doncha be a smartypants n ask what century dat would be like ya did last phone call, ultram professional. I don’t need ta think of ya. Didn’t you hear me say I told dat old fart ‘yes’ without even thinking?Why should I “think” bout you instead of campaigning like some responsible Mom or something. Uh, like yeah, dats what being a “maverick” is all about, don’t cha know, buy ultram online without prescription. Ultram uk, (smile and a wink)
But, Mom, I’m snowed in, there’s a lot of scratching and howling at the door, buy cheap ultram internet, we’re out of food…
There ya go again askin for food ta eat so you and da little ones won’t starve again. After da campaign, Buy ultram generic, I’ll… bring… it… to… ya. (wink, wink, wink)
(She laughs at her “wit” and switches the cell to the call on hold as; in the background,
find ultram, you hear a door caving in and the sound of ravenous wolves eating.)
OK, Liz, I’m back. just my little snot of a bratty kid. Buy ultram online without prescription, Uh, oh, where are all my hunky SS men. What are all dose black thingies in my rear and side view mirors. Why are all the limo car doors open. Well, Lizikins, gotta hang up now, ya hear. Girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. More to add ta hubbie’s roadkill cooler, buy ultram online without prescription. Life’s good. Will get even better when the old fart keels over two weeks into my administration. (wink, wink, wink, wink, wink, wink, wink, wink, wink, wink, wink, wink) See ya sweetie!
(Scribe’s comment: “Every time she speaks and winks Scribe understands why she refers to herself as a ’sock her girl.’ Scribe would be surprised if that hasn’t happened more than once. He guesses her hubbie plays rock em’ and sock em’ robots a lot, only he doesn’t need ‘robots.’ She LIKES it.”)
Next week: stay tuned… John McSame upgrades his VP choice to a better example of motherhood: BRITNEY SPEARS..
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