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January 29, 2014

Global (and judicial) warming and cooling: Why we get both

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , — Jane Stillwater @ 1:17 pm

It seems to me that the reason we get global warming in some places and global cooling in others should be as plain as the nose on your face — at least to those of us who live in Berkeley.

Whenever it gets hot in Walnut Creek, over the hill from Berkeley, we always get a strong wind here as our own cooler air rushes over to balance out Walnut Creek’s hotspots.

So global warming and cooling should clearly work in the same way — except on a planetary scale. As Florida really heats up, for instance, cold air from the Arctic should rush in to balance temperatures out. And hurricanes and tornadoes appear to be getting bigger and nastier here to compensate for temperature changes somewhere else. All over the planet, increased warm areas are being balanced out by increased cold areas — and vice-versa. That’s my new climate-change theory and I’m sticking to it.

And Justice works the same way as well. We gotta have liberty and justice for all — and not just for Poobahs and cartels. Because if we don’t, it’s all going to even out in the end eventually — one way or another.

Everyone everywhere keeps track of these things.

And when justice only goes to the wealthy and not to the poor, things definitely get hotter in one spot and cooler in another.

When big banks act unjustly and screw small homeowners, they are creating a financial “Polar Vortex” http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/everything-is-rigged-the-biggest-financial-scandal-yet-20130425. When corporations get billions in welfare while people who actually need government services — and pay taxes for them too — are told they are moochers, then areas of highs and lows are created and wretched imbalances are struck.

When Justin Bieber doesn’t get deported for being drunk and disorderly yet other hard-working non-citizens who are helping to make America stronger get thrown in jail just for being on this side of a border, fair weather could become cloudy with a chance of injustice (although Bieber has just set a legal precedent that immigration attorneys all over America can now use to defend their clients. Way to go, Beebs!)

According to Noel Castellanos, “Justice is doing more than saving the drowning people, it’s changing the ones who are pushing them into the lake.” And in all too many countries all over the Global South, where social justice and economic democracy are in short supply, both economic disasters and violent (and non-violent) revolutions are common. “Why should I respect the rule of law when it doesn’t respect me?” seems to be the gist of thinking in the Global South.

And as social, economic and legal injustices become more and more common in America now too, and more and more of America’s “justice for all” has become only “justice for corporations,” economic democracy is now becoming a museum piece here too, a thing of the past along with crank telephones and kerosene lamps — leaving us open for violent (and non-violent) revolutions to start flowing into the low areas here too.

Handing out fake justice to some but denying it to others is a really good formula for making peace impossible all over the world and in America too — and, to paraphrase that old TV commercial, “Peace is our most important product”.

And apparently both the weather system and the justice system in America right now are refusing to tolerate extreme highs and lows.

Don’t say you haven’t been warned.

PS: Speaking of justice, at this month’s Berkeley-Albany Bar Association luncheon (curried chicken and caesar salad at the Berkeley City Club), a prominent trial attorney gave us his annual talk on what the U.S. Supreme Court had been up to this past year. And here are some things that he said. If I got any of it wrong, it’s my fault — not his. So don’t judge him. Judge me — for taking bad notes.

“The first thing you should know about the current Supreme Court is that it has a 44% approval rating with the American public.”

And regarding individual judges, the speaker told us that, “Thomas is silent on the bench at all times. He never asks any questions. Scalia is very influential, but I can’t see why. He also never looks at any foreign laws and is totally not interested in what other countries think. His originalism comes at a very bad time, however. Imagine if Thomas Jefferson had been like that. Kagan used to be a dean — and deans are all about authority. Alito is a pleasant person but has always worked for the government and has never worked with individuals who were being oppressed. Ginsberg used to work for the ACLU. Sotomayor is one of the most impressive on the court.”

“Five of these judges have committed our country to terrible things that they never revealed to the Senate during their confirmation hearings.”

“According to Dworkin, the job of a judge is philosophical and broad — and when doing it in a democracy, you also need to understand the basics of a democracy as well.”

“This year it is still the five vs. the four, and the four’s teeth are worn down to a terrible point because four is not enough.”

“Scalia came out against actual innocence this year. Most of us think that if you are proven innocent after sentencing, you should be able to turn in your orange jump suit and go home. One man, after 17 years in jail, was proven not to have committed the crime. Scalia disagreed that he should be released.”

“Criminal law has become an incredibly regulated event with regard to sentencing. Judges no longer have the flexibility in this area that they once had.”

“The Court struck down the identity-card voting law in Arizona. Thomas and Alito dissented.”

“Regarding ex post facto sentencing, Sotomayor wrote the opinion. Guidelines that were not in effect at the time of sentencing can’t change the sentencing later.”

“Regarding one DNA verdict, Scalia, Kagan Sotomayor and Ginsberg got together on this one — slowing that it was not just the usual straight five-to-four mix last year.”

“What if a defendant stops talking after he is arrested? Can his silence be commented on or held against him as evidence of guilt?” Not sure how that case turned out.

“Right to a lawyer — a competent lawyer, providing standards for attorneys not only the standards provided by the state bar. Trevino v. Thaler was habeas corpus case regarding ineffective assistance of counsel.” The court ruled that Texas didn’t consider that Trevino had ineffective counsel before sending him to Death Row.

“Daimler v. Bauman. Dealt with Argentina’s Dirty War and jurisdiction. No, you can’t hold to account foreigners involved in torture overseas. This one was recently decided.”

“The race factor: Not appropriate for U-Texas Austin to use it for admissions without an airtight justification and the application of direct scrutiny. Only Ginsberg dissented.”

“Adequacy of drug warnings are preempted by federal law.”

“U.Texas medical center v. Nassar: Employment discrimination must be proved by lots of evidence. Ginsberg dissented.” The Supreme Court made it harder for employees who were charging discrimination and retaliation to win their cases.” http://verdict.justia.com/2013/07/09/revenge-the-supreme-court-narrows-protection-against-workplace-retaliation-in-university-of-texas-southwestern-medical-center-v-nassar

“Class actions: The Supreme court has been limiting them in the past. However, in Angen v. Connecticut Retirement Plans, materiality did not need to be proved in order to establish a case as a class action. Alito, Thomas and Scalia dissented.” I just bet they did.

“Patents: DNA cannot be patented. Unanimous decision. Things that are open and obvious don’t deserve a patent. But no one on the Supreme Court knows much about patents. They are all generalists in an age of specialization — but, in their position, must take a broad range of cases anyway.”

PPS: Am leaving for Haiti on February 12. According to Dr. Paul Farmer, Haiti has undergone centuries of injustice on a frightening scale. According to Farmer, “The idea that some lives matter less is the root of all that’s wrong with the world.” http://www.pih.org/blog/paul-farmer-haiti-after-the-earthquake. And Haiti is now also the victim of climate change as well.

Haiti is a perfect example of what I have been talking about here. And apparently Haitians are totally ready to support both “justice for all” and climate stability — and also Jean-Bertrand Aristide as well. Go them.

Ye Olde Scribe Says…

Filed under: Uncategorized — Ye Olde Scribe @ 9:04 am


A corporation is a “person” in the same sense that THE Rock is actual a “rock.”

January 24, 2014

Paranoia strikes deep: Why wisdom & kindness trumps greed, paranoia & fear

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , — Jane Stillwater @ 9:57 pm

I used to really really hate housework but don’t hate it so much any more — ever since I developed my fabulous new housecleaning system wherein I just do 15 minutes of housework a day, but do it each day consistently, using a timer so as not to cheat.

You’d be surprised how much you can get done in just 15 minutes, but you gotta do it daily, no matter what — even if some newbee student dentist has just finished scraping all those extra bone fragments out of the socket of your recently-pulled (phantom) tooth and then practiced her rusty stitching techniques on your poor bleeding gums.

And here’s another added bonus to my housecleaning system: After having spent approximately 5,475 minutes a year for the past six years on trying to keep this damn place clean, I have actually sort of started to bond with my home.

So. A few days ago I was cleaning stuff out of an old filing cabinet, and came across a whole bunch of articles that I had written way back in the day — back before we had all kinds of self-publishing apps available online; and even back before there was FaceBook or blogs or Kindle or Twitter or even Instagram and YouTube.

And, way back in those old paleo days, writers such as myself had actually been forced to photocopy our articles, write up a cover letter and then send them all off to magazine editors with self-addressed stamped envelopes enclosed. Totally old school. Can you even imagine doing that now?

And there at the very bottom of one of those file drawers, I found over two hundred rejection letters from various editors and publishers. Amazing.

Dontcha just love publishing over the internet instead? (And thank goodness for net neutrality too — which is currently being threatened. Shouldn’t we start boycotting Verizon, AT&T and Comcast over this? C’mon, all you independent bloggers, Tweeters and self-publishers, let’s get off our butts and fight for less intervention and more high-speed!) http://www.latimes.com/business/hiltzik/la-fi-mh-net-neutrality-20140114,0,522106.story

And speaking of the internet, those huge and powerful corporations which now own our government are still using it to spy on all of us — and not just us writers. Now why would corporations want to do that? Because they are paranoid. And greedy. And afraid.

I used to be paranoid and greedy and afraid too — but am now here to tell you that, in the long run, paranoia and greed and fear are just too damn much hard work. Wisdom and kindness are better. And easier too. Just ask Jesus. And Gandhi. And Martin Luther King Jr.

“But Jane,” you might say, “that kind of slacker attitude could get you killed.” True. It certainly got King and Gandhi and Jesus killed. But at least I would die while feeling all proud of myself as I cross over — not huddled up in some miserable isolated Midas-like earthly fortress while watching the rest of the world end before my very eyes and with only my black, ice-cold-hearted evil soul (that nobody else would ever want to spend time with, ev-ah) to keep me company. Yuck.

Anyway, back at the filing cabinet, I began reading through some of my old articles again — and some of them were really actually quite good. The one about my struggles to get my aging father into an assisted-care home was particularly poignant — and how my mean sister had dragged me through probate court after he died, just when I was grieving the most. I later published it on the internet, entitled “Probating the Family Feud” — and a lot of people actually read it there too. http://veracityvoice.com/?p=1158

And I also found something I had written back in 2005 — back when Fallujah was a horrible war-crime-induced hot mess; about all my efforts to embed with the Army there. And how I finally did embed with the Marines in Heet and Haditha two years later http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2007_10_01_archive.html.

But apparently Fallujah is still a war-torn hot mess even today; the only difference being that Iraqis, not Americans, are now doing most of the killing in Al Anbar province. So does that make all this current senseless slaughter of civilians less of a war crime — because civilians are now being senselessly slaughtered by local hordes instead of by American hordes? http://www.globalresearch.ca/the-third-battle-of-fallujah/5364369

Ten years later, I still want to go to Fallujah.

Or as one friend in Iraq calls it, “Fallujahpaloooza”. Laughter through tears. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dt5qaMHQDfw&desktop_uri=%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DDt5qaMHQDfw&app=desktop

And then I discovered, hidden back at the very bottom of my filing cabinet, a rough draft of my first novel. I loved that novel so much! But NOBODY would publish it. Nobody. That novel had everything — love, death, war, peace, history, philosophy, drama, even intergalactic travel — and even one fast-moving chapter on how wisdom and kindness always trumps greed, paranoia and fear. “Pictures of a Future World” was the title. I may get around to publishing it yet — but this time I’ll try Kindle.

PS: Here’s an excerpt from my old unpublished novel, “Pictures of a Future World”:

All eyes turn to the Shaman, who continues to speak from his deep trance.

The atmosphere in the sandstone kiva comes alive. The Shaman moves his mind to a new point of consciousness. Another one of his emanations begins to speak, this time in an intensely penetrating tone. “There is a tree on the mesa top,” the deep voice slowly intones. “It has watched the raider warriors kill our people one by one. It has seen us begin to build our houses here in the dark shadows of the canyon walls instead of up on the sunny mesa tops where they belong…so that we might be safe…from the raider warriors.

“They are killers.

“We are prey.

“So has it always been. So shall it always be.

“There is no place that we can go on the face of this earth that is safe from them…either now or in the far distant future… when even our mesa-top trees are dead.

“Raiders will always hunt peaceful men.

“They will find us, and they will kill our bodies just as the coyote kills the hare.”

Absolute silence falls like a black shroud inside the kiva.

Everyone waits for the Shaman to speak again. Even the Shaman himself waits. Is this all that he is going to say? By now the ceremonial kiva is as bright as day, the elders rigid with attention.

“Of these things we must never be afraid, ever,” the Shaman continues. “The raiders may search us out, the barbarians may chase us down and trap us and corner us like rats…from now until the end of time.

“The needy ones, the greedy ones will hunt us in order to make our wisdom and our abundance their own. They will act out of evil caused by envy, jealousy or need. Whatever their reasons — that is the way of it. No place is safe. We must be prepared to give up our bodies at any time, willingly and without fear or regret.

“Because our bodies are not us.”

The Shaman breathes slowly now, and the clan members sense that he is struggling within himself, trying to clarify what he alone is seeing, forcing himself to go on. A moment passes. The mask presses heavily upon him. Finally he continues: “We of the pueblo all know this. We are all made brave because of this knowledge. This we know: That always men of peace will die bravely. That always barbarians will try to kill us and to take our spirits.

“All of us know that the spirit of a man of peace can never belong to a barbarian and can never be harmed. Ever. It is this knowledge that gives us the courage to continue to live without fear in a world exploding with enemies, enemies gone mad with their own anger and need and violence and lust for our blood.”

The air inside the womb-like kiva begins to take on a life of its own; humid, dense, and pulsing.

Inside the ponderous deer-head mask, the Shaman tries to refocus his energy. He watches his body and his mind divide into a series of complex grids. Each one of these grids contains an image of himself. A part of him wonders which grid is his real self. A part of him knows that his real self is all of them — or none.

More chanting fills the air. The Shaman forgets about the raider warriors. They are a part of life. They will always be there…like the trees. Like the mesa.

January 15, 2014

From a different perspective: Rethinking Ariel Sharon & Chris Christie

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , — Jane Stillwater @ 2:01 pm

Ever since Ariel Sharon began rising up through the ranks of Israeli neo-con politics by hook or by crook, I’ve always viewed him as a Bad Guy. But maybe he wasn’t all that bad after all — at least not within the time-frame right before his sudden stroke. According to former IGF officer Roi Tov, Sharon might have finally seen the light and started actually implementing some of the few hopeful features of GWB’s ill-conceived “Road Map,” now a document as long-forgotten as Mr. Bush himself.

Tov is an Israeli journalist who I always love to read because he always seems to have juicy insider knowledge of all the latest hot gossip about what is going on in the highest Israeli neo-con circles. And according to Tov, Sharon had been taking the Peace Process a little bit too seriously right before his sudden stroke and, like Rabin, needed to be stopped. http://www.roitov.com/articles/sharonmahriv.htm

Sharon himself must have constantly been aware, like all good neo-cons everywhere have known since way back in JFK’s day, that when you play in neo-con Big Leagues, you gotta toe the current party line or else. But at least Sharon, there toward the end, might possibly have tried at long last to do the Right Thing toward establishing peace with Palestine — perhaps knowing full well that doing so would cause him to tangle with the Shin Beth. Perhaps I should give Sharon snaps for that. Taking on the Shin Beth is not for the timid of heart.

Perhaps Sharon finally wanted to atone for being the Butcher of Sabra and Shatila. Hey, it could happen.

But, if so, Sharon must have also forgotten the Number One neo-con rule: “Cross us and you are a dead man. We eat our young.” Sucks to be you, Ariel Sharon!

Anyway. We may never know the whole story. Neither Sharon nor Rabin are talking. And neither is the Shin Beth.

Israeli politics are so much fun to watch — almost as much fun as watching American politics. Which brings me to the subject of Chris Christie. “What did he know and when did he know it?” seems to be the big question on everyone’s lips. But, for me, the real question here should be, “Why the freak do Americans continue to passively put up with all of America’s constant and soul-killing traffic jams in the first place?”

If Christie and/or his loyal staff hadn’t caused the Fort Lee traffic jam, then something else would have caused it.

There are traffic jams all over America right now, night and day. 24/7. And nobody seems to even notice or care. We all just passively endure wasting hours and hours of our life each day that we will never get back.

For instance, the new San Francisco bay bridge is awesome to look at, but as a vehicle-mover, it sadly fails. The old bridge handled up to one-third more cars-per-hour than this new, spectacular one.

But all these new bridges and old bridges and freeways and rush-hour traffic jams all beg the huge major question, which is: “What kind of harsh air-pollution hazards are all these idling, gridlocked vehicles creating? And when are we going to finally take climate change seriously and start eliminating the use of pollution-causing motor vehicles entirely?”

This new scandal regarding Governor Christie and Fort Lee might be offering us a really good opportunity to start a national dialogue with regard to, first, the development of more public transportation options in order to alleviate traffic jams and save the air, and, second, finally doing something about the limited safety and diminishing returns of using cars themselves in this disastrous day and age of life-threatening climate change.

January 13, 2014

Ariel Sharon (1928-2014): My country, because of thee…

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , — Jane Stillwater @ 12:59 pm

Sweet land of liberty? “For thee I mourn.”

Ariel Sharon just died. He was America’s friend. What does that say about us? The Butcher of Sabra and Shatila just died, a friend of Washington DC for the last 20-odd years, feted by the White House, praised by Congress — from every mountainside.

Sharon is the kind of man that catches the eye of American leaders. http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2014/01/11/obama-mourns-sharon-death-vows-us-unshakable-commitment-to-israeli-security/

Men like Ariel Sharon are lifted up and feted and praised. Men like Ariel Sharon, who can coldly give orders to kill hundreds of women and children without a second glance or a second thought? These kind of men? These are the kind of men we can teach our children to admire and praise? http://www.informationclearinghouse.info/article37297.htm

I’m sorry that Ariel Sharon is dead. I’m sorry when any human being dies. I’ll even be sorry at my own death — but it is for America that I mourn for the most at the passing of Ariel Sharon. America, who used to bravely condemn the actions of mass murderers? America who fought against Stalin and Hitler? America now actually feeds these monsters with cold hard cash — and places cold, hard weapons in their hands.

“Land where our fathers died….” Let freedom ring.

January 9, 2014

Like pulling teeth: Adventures in gardening and dentistry

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , — Jane Stillwater @ 2:44 pm

Two rather interesting things have happened to me lately. First, I had one of my teeth pulled this week — totally not a fun experience. And, second, while still oozing pain and eating Hydrocodone and climbing the walls, I started reading a book about plants by Michael Pollan, entitled “The Botany of Desire”. So now I have suddenly become an expert on both pain-killers and gardens.

Having one’s tooth pulled is like, er, pulling teeth. It really hurts. So from now on I plan to brush and floss constantly and do whatever it takes to keep my remaining teeth healthy and clean. Someone recommended gargling with Bombay Sapphire twice a day. I’d try even that.

Even though the student doctor who pulled my tooth at the UCSF School of Dentistry was an angel of mercy combined with Dr. McDreamy, having one’s tooth extracted is never pretty. I kept reciting that mantra “Challenges make me stronger” in the dental chair and silently doing jin shin jyutzu http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t4eRsF3PRQo — but even that didn’t work. I’m a wimp. And not only that but once the tooth was out, they wouldn’t even give it back to me to give to the Tooth Fairy. Rats.

Then, once finally back home and safely collapsed into bed, I took some of those “opioid” pain-killers they gave me — and dreamed that I was an escaped convict running a funeral parlor in my childhood hometown (Millbrae) and hiding under my daughter Ashley’s bed (probably from NSA). Forget that. No more weird Kubla-Khan dreams for me. I’m sticking with aspirin.

Now I’m wishing there was something I could do to replace my poor sweet little lost tooth, but there doesn’t seem to be anything. Getting a dental implant is expensive — $3,000 per tooth, even done by a dental student. Who can afford that? Not me. So now I’ve got a big gap in my teeth. How ugly is that! However, I won’t be alone for long. Two-thirds of America will soon be joining me in being gap-toothed as well unless affordable dental insurance becomes available reasonably soon. But if not, then we’ll all be totally ugly together, not just me. America goes third-world. Who would have thought.

I also have a postage-stamp sized garden attached to my apartment, which grows nothing. According to Michael Pollan, this shouldn’t be happening — unless there has been some really heavy-duty weed killer sprayed there at one time. Yes, there was. But not by me. So, apparently, what I need now is all new dirt. And at the rate that American agribusiness keeps using millions of tons of herbicides and pesticides each year, all of America will soon be needing all new dirt too.

“Actually, it’s not the heavy use of herbicides and pesticides that is causing the most problems on huge agribusiness farms,” to summarize one of Pollan’s chapters on the potato, “but rather the monoculture nature of their crops. Organic farmers can vary and rotate what they plant and thus stave off insect and fungal infestations — but if your main customer for potatoes is McDonalds, then you have to plant Burbank russets and only Burbank russets all of the time. So it is Americans themselves that are causing the major use of [stuff] like Roundup and Roundup-Ready GMOs.”

So if I promise to plant a huge variety of everything in my garden, from fingerling potatoes to roses to dandelions, then will at least SOMETHING finally grow?

And will I also be able to grow a new tooth?

PS: Aside from Michael Pollan, why else have my thoughts been turning to gardening lately? In the middle of freaking January? Because this winter has been the sunniest one in Berkeley that I have ever seen. It’s like freaking summer here now, like July, every day — even going beyond April or May. www.weather.com even declared Berkeley a drought area the other day. Time to bust out the seeds.

Michael Pollan also wrote about cannabis in his book on plants. “Marijuana doesn’t make you forgetful of everything. It just makes you forget [stuff] that’s not important.” Interesting. I always forget names. So I guess names aren’t all that important or necessary for me to remember. Whew. I’m off the hook then. Am not getting senile dementia after all, just sorting out my priorities.

And maybe that’s why Alzheimer sufferers forget so much mental stuff too — they might be shutting down everything that won’t immediately help them to cope with this devastating disease (yes, I know that Alzheimers also rots its victims’ brains — but isn’t that just one more good reason for them to shut said brains down?)

PPS: With regard to raising the minimum wage here in soon-to-be-toothless America, wouldn’t it make more sense to just cut the rate of inflation instead? Starting by eliminating the Federal Reserve and its tendencies to print meaningless Monopoly money and to finance Endless War? And, while we’re at it, let’s stop giving out billions in “food stamps” to corporate welfare queens like Bank of America, BP, WalMart, Halliburton and Monsanto. Works for me. And can we also please bring our millions of jobs back from overseas too?

Back in 1963, I made $1.75 an hour while working in the post office on weekends and during summers. With this money plus some help from my parents (yes, they could also afford to help me back then), I was able to graduate from San Jose State College without requiring any student loans. And in 1966, when I got a big salary-bump to $3.50 an hour for working the stamp window instead of sorting mail, I was able put myself through graduate school at UC Berkeley, just by working during summer vacations. Can you even imagine staying alive and not homeless in Berkeley today on that kind of salary — let alone paying for your tuition at Cal as well.

What has happened to all of America’s jobs and wealth since the 1960s, back when we were the richest country in the world? That’s a no-brainer. It’s all flown away into the pockets of Wall Street mega-bankers, the numbered Cayman accounts of war profiteers and the fat wallets of all those corporate welfare queens who currently own and run our government.
While it’s always a good idea to raise America’s minimum wage a few dollars, it’s also important to stop runaway inflation — and to also start lowering a certain type of maximum wage as well: The maximum amount that rich guys can steal from us before they get sent to jail.
And we need to put some teeth into these new regulations too.

PPPS: New development. Holy cow. Now I’m all sitting here in abject pain being caused by my phantom tooth that has already been pulled. Why can’t I have the same dental plan that Congressional representatives have! http://online.wsj.com/news/articles/SB10001424052702304325004579296140856419808

January 3, 2014

Lenny Bruce, Alan Ginsberg, and Rush Limbaugh

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , — Bob Patterson @ 1:32 pm

Jann S. Wenner had a very seductive way of convincing writers to work on his new magazine; he would promise them life in the journalists’ Valhalla by saying:  “You can write about anything you want” and since prospects for liberal punditry at the beginning of a year that will consist mainly of covering the Republican Sitdown Strike in Congress at a time when leftists have been banished from the ranks of talk radio, the only way for management to generate enthusiasm from beleaguered columnists is to duplicate the vague mission statement that lured talent to the headquarters of Rolling Stone Magazine at 625 Third Street in San Francisco almost a half a century ago.

Who wouldn’t want to be assigned to escape Winter in the Northern Hemisphere and go to Canberra to write an article titled “SummerNats is Decadent and Depraved!”?  The defunct Scanlan’s Magazine started a journalistic tradition of writing an installment in the Decadent and Depraved series of sports exposes when they sent a rookie to cover the Kentucky Derby.  That pioneer of Gonzo Journalism is gone, but shouldn’t the tradition be preserved to spark enthusiasm in a new generation?

Since the 2014 SummerNats is being held this weekend in Canberrra, it’s too late to seek an assignment that would subsidize a trip there.  Wouldn’t the 2015 installment of an annual Australian event that uses the unofficial motto of “beer, boobs, and burnouts!,” seem like an excellent choice to qualify for being included in Scanlon’s magazines series of profiles of depraved sporting events?  We should probably send them a query letter rather quickly.  (Note:  we used a file photo from the 2009 SummerNats as the illustration for this column.)

If Dr. Hunter S. Thompson isn’t available to spoof political punditry in 2014 by writing a scathing piece to fill the space under a headline that reads:  “Is the USA ready for a chick President?;” then who in the Gonzo bullpen is a better choice than The World’s Laziest Journalist?  Wouldn’t a quote from Frank Sinatra about “frails” put it over the goal line?

Aren’t the Republican strategists beginning to assemble an arsenal of sexist sentiment in anticipation of the 2016 Presidential Election?

Since articles about the unverifiable results from the electronic voting machines must either be an enthusiastic endorsement of that questionable facet of democracy in action or be a nominee for the Conspiracy Theory Bunkum of the year award, it might be an example of discretion to aim, instead, for something more accessible.  Since the schedule has just been posted, it may be time to decide how (not “if”) we will cover Noir City 12, the film festival that starts in San Francisco later this month on January 24.

If Phil Robertson just got forgiveness for his recent controversial rant, could it be that conservatives are slowly building toward a denouement in 2014 that provides a crucial turning point whereby Uncle Rushbo either gets absolution for using the N-word on the air, or destroys his career and becomes a martyr for freedom of speech?  Would the Leftists’ holy trinity of freedom of speech then become Lenny Bruce, Alan Ginsberg, and Rush Limbaugh?

Fox got some publicity by airing the F-bomb word as part of their New Year’s Eve coverage.  Is this going to be the year of the on air F-bombs?

Since progressive radio talk show host Norman Goldman had a scoop about how the series of “fiscal cliff” crises had been broken, we would rather not write a sloppy seconds version of that obscure aspect of American Political History.

We have missed the deadline for applying for press credentials for covering the Oscar Awards Ceremonies which will be held at the Kodak Theater in Hollywood in just a few weeks.  Perhaps we can channel the spirit of Gonzo Journalism and talk our way into getting a special deadline dispensation, getting a press pass, and then doing some reports about this year’s mad scramble to give acceptant speeches.   (Garry Cooper gave the shortest acceptance speech.  It consisted of just one word:  “Thanks!”)

Speaking of eloquent sales pitches, perhaps we can convince Jerry Cimino to resurrect the Beatmobile (AKA the Beat Museum on Wheels) and take a contingent of writers on a round trip from the North Beach area of San Francisco to this year’s celebration of Hemingway Days in Key West, Fla.  If we could get a ride on such a hypothetical quest journey, we could do a series of Gonzo reports on our continuing effort to establish Hemingway as the prototype Beatnik.

The assignment desk at the World’s Laziest Journalist World Headquarters will tantalize the staff with the possibility that in 2014 somebody will be assigned to cover the 24 hour sports car race at Le Mans before being given the task of being the results wrangler for the Mid-Term Elections Desk later in the year.

Speaking of Demographics, recently a friend insinuated that crusading liberal journalists are “mouth breathers.”  If he thinks that Leftists are dummies, perhaps we should start doing some fact checking for a column that would provide statistics to back the contention that the average PBS News Hour audience member has a better education than the high school dropouts who are addicted to the quality level available at Fox propaganda?

Have some clever Republicans started using reverse psychology?  Aren’t some staunch Republicans starting to wear some Wendell Wilkie “No Third Term” buttons from the 1940 Presidential Election as a way of introducing a move to grant President Obama an exemption from the two terms limit?  Isn’t that a stealth a way to manipulate disgruntle Democrats into either endorsing a third term for Obama or expressing public disappointment in the lame duck’s track record?  If the Republicans do pass such a change, wouldn’t Barick Obama still be young enough for a third term in 2020 if the incumbent isn’t’ a fellow Democrat.

Berkeley blogger, war correspondent, and grandmother Jane Stillwater, tipped us to the fact that this year’s Boucher Con known as “Murder at the Beach” this year, for the fans of mystery novels will be held in Long Beach California and so we are penciling in coverage of that event which will be held November 11 to 16, this year.

The new film, “The Wolf of Wall Street,” is a Horatio Alger, rags to riches, saga that will motivate and inspire young Republicans for decades to come, and so we may soon write a full film review as a column.  The Ayn Randian premise of the film is simple:  If a fellow makes millions of dollars, it doesn’t matter who else gets hurt in the process.  The real question is “How many Oscars will it win?”

It brings to mind the old Hollywood wisdom:  “Be careful whom you step while climbing to the top, because you may have to step on them again, on your way back down.”

Speaking of wolfpack capitalism, will 2014 be the year that the Republican majority Congress starts to take measures to solve the looming prospect of a deficit for the Social Security program?

Dr. Hunter S. Thompson described the Myth of Sisyphus aspect of a late start when he wrote:  “The press handler was shocked at the idea that anyone would be stupid enough to apply for press credentials two days before the Derby.”

Now the disk jockey will get us in the SummerNats frame of mind by playing Jerry Lee Lewis’ “What made Milwaukee famous,”  Rusty Warren’s “Bounce your boobies,” and the Beach Boys’ “Little Deuce Coup.”  We have to start checking to see if a certain couch in Marina del Rey is available for crashing during the Oscar weekend festivities.  Have an “I want to thank the members of the Academy . . .” type week and a happy new year.

January 2, 2014

Keeping abreast: Hazards of picking wives based on mammary-gland size & politicians based on…

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , — Jane Stillwater @ 8:35 pm

If you are a guy who is out looking for a bride who you would want to spend the rest of your life with, what qualities would you look for in a perspective life’s companion? Compatibility? Sunny disposition? Common interests? Kind heart? Brains? Earning capacity? What? Remember that we’re talking about selecting a wife who you will have to hold conversations with for approximately two hours a day over the course of the next 60-odd years (that’s 43,800 hours) — and even wake up next to each morning approximately 21,900 times.

All too many American males these days seem to pick their future life’s companion based solely on her mammary gland size. Good luck with that one! 60 years from now, your wife’s mammary glands will be a moot question, but you will still have to talk to her — and you’d probably be bored out of your mind by that time if you have selected her for her breast size alone (or, conversely, if she had married you solely based on the look of your sexy six-pack package, she might be bored out of her mind by that time too!)

So here’s some good advice, gentlemen (and ladies as well): Pick your future spouses based on the size of their minds and their hearts, not on the size of their implants!

And I wouldn’t recommend Phil Robertson’s method of picking wives either — which just might land you on a sex-offender registry for the next 60 years. http://www.addictinginfo.org/2013/12/29/phil-robertson-marriage-advice/ But then apparently Robertson and his duckie friends used to be just one more bunch of yuppie fraternity boys trying to break into “The Hills” until they discovered they could make more money by representing southerners as ignorant unwashed bigots. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KW343K1-upo&sns=fb

And this same rule — of seriously examining long-term consequences before making important decisions — also needs to be applied to how we pick our politicians as well.

Selecting a congressional representative or president or governor or even local dog-catcher based solely on information you have gleaned from the Koch brothers, Citizens United and Fox News may make you feel good at the time — but 60 years down the road when the planet has been destroyed by pollution, radiation, Endless War and climate change and you are poor as a church-mouse because there are no more unions or Social Security to protect you and your children are uneducated and starving on sweatshop wages, you will definitely look back on those elections and say, “What was I thinking!”

And also do try to apply this “Mind and Heart” rule to how we select our healthcare as well. Let’s try to be more aware of what happens next, cause and effect, in this respect too, before we fall for all those pretty ads that tell us that Sutter or Humana or Blue Cross is “On Our Side” — while behind closed doors these guys are happily screwing America’s doctors, nurses and patients, people like us, for every penny of ours that they can get their hands on. http://www.nationalnursesunited.org/

Approximately 1,800 Americans die from lack of healthcare per day http://www.michaelmoore.com/books-films/facts/sicko. In the next 3,650 days, we will needlessly lose approximately 6,570,000 Americans — stone cold dead so that CEOs of health insurance companies can own yachts. Where is the long-distance thinking here? Where is the outrage? http://www.tv.com/shows/greys-anatomy/transplant-wasteland-2676177/

When you look at the long run, only single-payer healthcare makes sense.

Bottom line: It’s time to start seriously keeping abreast of our long-term hopes, goals and aspirations here in America, or else we’re never gonna find any long-term happiness here either — just an empty handful of public-relations-generated illusions and a whole big bunch of “Coulda shoulda woulda….”

PS: Another way that Americans are constantly being fooled is by having our strong sense of justice, honesty and morality turned inside-out and then used against us. If someone on TV keeps telling Americans over and over again that acts of murder, theft, lying, bigotry and greed committed in our name are actually just good Christian values, Americans naively tend to believe this. http://www.alternet.org/story/19811/a_man_of_his_words

As a whole, Americans are kind, generous and moral people who always want to do the Right Thing. But what is the right thing? Bankers who steal from both our government and their clients? Corporations who deliberately sell us junk that will kill us and happily poison our air if it saves them a buck? War profiteers who send our sons and daughters overseas to act as their personal goon-squad thugs and then send our same sons and daughters back home in a box when their usefulness is over? And racists and bigots who thump the Bible in order to justify their own evil ways?

Justice? The Ten Commandments? Freedom and patriotism and the First and Second Amendments? Most Americans believe in these things — and so these very beliefs, the solidly-felt beliefs of good people, are constantly being used against us by Bad Guys in order to pillage and lie and steal in the name of God, apple pie and the Flag.

It’s time for Americans to start keeping abreast of what is really happening to them — not what is only supposed to be happening. And it’s time for our leaders in sheep’s clothing who are always talking the talk to actually start walking the walk as well — of justice and fairness and morality — or else go off to jail where they belong. “Thou shalt not murder, steal or bear false witness…” must apply to us all.

PPS: And speaking of breasts, apparently we ladies should also be keeping our breasts away from the Pacific ocean forevermore — if we don’t want to get cancer. Why? Toxic radiation.

Here’s a video of some guy with a Geiger counter walking along a beach near San Francisco. Just watch his Geiger counter jump up from a normal reading of 34 to an outrageously-high and dangerous reading of 156 as he approaches the Pacific ocean. Please Please Please let this video be a fake! Otherwise we females here on the West Coast are clearly in big trouble. http://topinfopost.com/2013/12/26/fukushima-radiation-hits-san-francisco.

However, somebody else just wrote to tell me that I should stop worrying about radiation drifting over here from Fukushima. “Why worry about Fukushima when 47,500 55-gallon steel drums containing nuclear waste had already been dumped out near the Farallon Islands between 1960 and 1970, and there’s a fair chance that those barrels might be now starting to corrode and open. So why would anyone be surprised by high levels of radiation at a beach near San Francisco? And why assume that it’s coming all the way from Fukushima, more than 5000 miles away — when so much was dumped here, just 30 miles away?” Why indeed.

We shoulda looked more closely at who we voted for 60 years ago!

December 26, 2013

The CIA gets it wrong — again

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: — Jane Stillwater @ 10:12 pm

The CIA really screwed up back in 1961 when it plotted to murder Patrice Lumumba — and just look at the mess it created in all of central Africa as a result, even today. The CIA also blew it bigtime when it assassinated the democratically-elected president of Iran back in 1952 — and Iran has pretty much been one of the CIA’s biggest headaches ever since.

And of course there was also the CIA’s famous Mandela fiasco — wherein “The Company” supported apartheid in South Africa and schemed to have Mandela thrown in jail. No wonder Raul Castro was so welcome at Mandela’s funeral. Cuba was a major anti-apartheid player, while the CIA once again stood on the wrong side of history, supported the Bad Guys and helped engineer the evils of bantustans, mass torture, dumpasses and the cold-blooded slaughter of school girls — plus the CIA, like one other dynasty I could mention right now, also put out false propaganda that South Africa was awash with happy Blacks picking cotton.

The CIA’s next total blunder took place in Chile. How many thousands and thousands were tortured and killed there for no reason as a result of CIA interference in a democratically-elected government there? According to the Washington Post, the number was 32,197 — but we may never know the real statistics for sure. Let’s list Chile as another political (and moral) failure for “The Agency”.

Don’t even get me started on Vietnam. Or Cambodia. A land-war in Asia? Never a good idea.

And let’s not forget the CIA’s disgusting and ugly ongoing disaster in Central America, starting in 1954 when the CIA drew up a “disposal list” to systematically assassinate 58 of Guatemala’s democratically-elected leaders in order to install the worst sort of dictators there http://www.latinamericanstudies.org/guatemala/list.htm. This illegal and immoral strategy eventually cost American taxpayers untold billions of dollars — yet another big “Fail” for the “Certified Incompetents of America”.

And even today, when farmers in Honduras, El Salvador and Guatemala go out to plow their fields, they are still finding silent graves filled with whitened bones planted there by CIA-backed Death Squads. That whole decade of the 1980s was just one big blood bath after another in Guatemala, Honduras and El Salvador. I shudder to even think about it. So much shame is there. And so much bad PR for America.

But let’s not forget Iraq either, the CIA at its very lowest ebb. False intel there. A trillion dollars frittered away on creating corpses — a million of them by some counts. Wrong, wrong, wrong.

And the CIA-backed neo-cons in Israel have also been a big failure. Those IDF blackshirts have turned out to be nothing more than Cossacks in sheep’s clothing as they run their viscous pogroms through the Christian and Muslim shtetls of the West Bank and Gaza http://www.roitov.com/articles/mandela.htm.

Not to mention CIA failures in Afghanistan, Libya, Syria, Belfast, Beirut, Georgia, Cuba, Grenada and Dallas http://readersupportednews.org/opinion2/277-75/21159-focus-the-only-thing-we-have-to-fearis-the-cia. You can always count on the CIA to back the wrong players and/or play the wrong game. The whole Middle East is in flames today, thanks to the CIA. Not to mention the alleged blow-back in 2001 at the World Trade Center — or was that just another one of the CIA’s failed war games too? Either way, America also lost bigtime here due to the CIA. http://www.theamericanconservative.com/articles/cias-colossal-flop/

Thank goodness there was no CIA during the 1861 Civil War. It would have supported the Confederacy of course — and with the “Virginia Farm Boys” covering his back, General Lee would have lost even sooner than he did. Or imagine if “The Agency” had been around during the 1776 Revolution! With the kind of help that it has to offer, we’d still be saluting the Queen and sipping High Tea. And the CIA would have just loved George Armstrong Custer. “There are not enough Indians in the world to defeat the Seventh Cavalry.” Sounds like CIA spies wrote that report.

“But Jane,” you might ask, “if the CIA has had so many abominable black marks against it and such dismal failures on its books, how come ‘The Company’ hasn’t gone bankrupt yet?” That’s a very good question. If any other corporation in America had failed its customers this often, abysmally and immorally, one would think that it would have been forced to go bankrupt a long time ago. Its publicly-traded stock would have been worthless and laughed at. But not this “Company”. Apparently the CIA leads a very charmed life.

I occasionally wish that I could do something like that too — start a business and know for sure and always that no matter what wrong thing I would ever do with it, what ever bad business decision I would ever make or how often I would horribly screw up, I would still automatically make almost a hundred billion a year anyway. Wouldn’t that be cool — to just sit back and receive corporate welfare like “The Agency” does, no matter how badly I blow it. Those CIA people certainly do have it all going on.

“But Jane,” you might also ask, “the CIA is a government operation, not a corporation.” Yeah right. You just keep telling yourself that. The CIA never has to answer to We the People. It answers only to the corporations that own it. That’s not “government”. Government, in a true democracy, must be of service to its people. And how the freak have We ever been served by having America’s reputation shredded to ribbons throughout the world?

PS: In a recent article in the Berkeley Daily Planet, George Lakoff wrote about how neo-cons use the word “redistribution” in a very negative way, like it’s a freaking crime to take from the rich and give to the poor. http://www.berkeleydailyplanet.com/issue/2013-11-22/article/41654?headline=The-NY-Times-uncovers-conservative-attacks-then-prints-one-both-are-on-the-front-page–By-George-Lakoff

But where in the freak do rich people actually think that they got all their “trickle down” money in the first place? From poor working stiffs like you and me, of course. Duh. It’s called “Trickle up”.

Hell, if it weren’t for strikes and unions and grassroots political candidates like Alan Grayson and Elizabeth Warren, you and I would all be running around in loincloths and working 18-hour days right now so that the rich could get even richer. So isn’t it high time for us to “redistribute” some money back into our own pockets where it came from in the first place? Yeah, duh.

PPS: Spoiler alert — unrelated topic:

WHY do so many neo-cons have their knickers all in a twist right now over the use of the word “Holiday”? I don’t get it. Isn’t the word “Holiday” an abbreviation of the phrase “Holy Day”? So Fox News is now saying that Christmas isn’t holy? Huh? http://www.truthdig.com/report/item/bill_oreillys_war_on_jesus_20131224

December 22, 2013

Who else is paying for their Endless War? The CA court system is

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , — Jane Stillwater @ 1:51 pm

Let’s think about all those trillions of dollars that have been constantly pouring into war profiteers’ pockets ever since they invented Vietnam. All those trillions must have come from somewhere. Of course we all know that some of them came from the Federal Reserve where they print Monopoly money like crazy. And, ironically, some of them have also come from multiple humungous loans from China. Plus some of that money also found its way into the pockets of War Street at approximately the same time that “all the gold in Fort Knox” mysteriously disappeared. And a few trillion also seems to have just materialized out of thin air — as if there was some ethereal war-profiteer fairy out there happily waving her magic wand. But a lot of this destructive blood-money also came out of the pockets of us American taxpayers. Trillions of dollars. From you and me.

All too many of us hard-working Americans have been forced to gird up our loins and go without so that war profiteers can afford to live like kings, buy multiple yachts, drink Veuve Clicquot champagne and smoke Cuban cigars.

You and I have gone without jobs, schools, roads, police, fire departments, hospitals, etc. in order to pay handsomely for War Street’s right to kill babies and Live Large.

And, apparently, we are also being forced to live without the high-quality court system that we here in California had grown accustomed to. How do I know this? Because the Berkeley-Albany Bar Association just told me so!

At a recent luncheon meeting of BABA at the famed Berkeley City Club (designed by Julia Morgan herself) and over roast chicken, fruit salad and pie, a judge from the Alameda County Superior Court gave us a talk on the struggles that Alameda County is going through just to keep its court system working and its courthouse doors open these days.

“One billion dollars was lost in the budget last year,” the speaker told us. “This is the toughest time financially in the history of this court. We have never has to worry about money before — but now we worry about money all of the time. It is very difficult to juggle to keep all of our programs alive.” http://www.courthousenews.com/2013/03/12/55621.htm

“For instance, there have been 26 furlough days this year, where court employees didn’t get paid. Courthouses are closed. We used to have 72 judges and nine commissioners. Now there are 18 vacancies this year. We went from 940 employees to 720 employees. We need 104 more just to operate. There used to be seven civil court locations. Now there are only two. Four family courts have been reduced to one family court. Four probate locations have been reduced to one.” Heaven forbid that you should have to die and your ghost be forced to stand in line for hours at probate court.

“And if you get a traffic ticket anywhere in the county, you will have to drive all the way down to Fremont to contest it. People stand in line for blocks at 5 am to get their tickets handled — and may still have to come back. And the only reason Alameda County is barely keeping its head above water right now is because we have so many employees who are dedicated to bringing access to justice for all. Sacramento County, for instance, doesn’t even have a civil filing office bull pen. You just leave your unfiled summonses, pleadings and other documents in a drop-box. Some counties have over 5000 unfiled documents right now.”

And where is the money from all those unpaid salaries going? As far as I can tell, it is going into the pockets of tax-dodging corporate welfare queens and heartless and immoral war profiteers. Christmas is coming up. Would Jesus approve of all this random bloodshed and not-random greed? Can you actually imagine Him saying, “I am Jesus and I approve this message.” No way!

“Then there is the problem of criminal realignment. 30,000 prisoners have been released but next year there will be no money for their realignment — so more petty thefts will occur. This will be very interesting to see.” In other words, 30,00 prisoners will get out of jail with only bus fare and the clothes on their backs.

And also court electronic data systems have suffered. “In some smaller counties, the filing system consists of putting papers in a box. And our county no longer has the personnel to support inter-court filing of documents either.” So you have to go to one specific court if you want to file a complaint or a probate document or a traffic ticket protest or an unlawful detainer.

And speaking of unlawful detainers (that’s where people who don’t pay their rent get invited to court by their landlord), the California court system has been flooded with them. “There are so many banks with foreclosures. These are our priority cases. And 95% of them are getting settled because judges from other departments volunteer to help out and get these cases heard — because where else are people being threatened with foreclosure evictions going to go if they lose their homes?”

PS: At its next monthly luncheon meeting, BABA asked a federal judge to speak — only he talked about an excess of money in America instead of a dearth of it, and how there have been whole tornadoes and hurricanes of money, flooding down on the USA like hailstorms ever since Citizens’ United took effect.

“And there is the additional problem of having individuals with unlimited personal bank accounts now running for office,” said the judge. “When all this money flows into the election system, only wealthy people are elected.” And why shouldn’t rich people invest in buying elections? For every dollar a huge corporation or war profiteer spends on buying an election, he gets a 5000% return in pork-barrel dollars sent his way.

“Swing states are already saturated with money on the presidential-campaign level,” and so any more money being poured into those campaigns will have decreasing effectiveness. “But large sums of money have an overwhelming effect on local elections. But even though voters aren’t stupid, even when being constantly bombarded with expensive ads, fair elections are still impossible under the current system,” said the judge as I happily ate roast beef, baby spinach and cheesecake.

“We in America have a very narrow view of what constitutes corruption.” It’s not corrupt to buy an election any more — just as long as you use the new Supreme Court guidelines or have a friend at Diebold. You can’t just slip a poll-worker a fin any more. That’s corrupt. You gotta be new-school about it. http://readersupportednews.org/opinion2/277-75/20755-top-10-ways-the-us-is-the-most-corrupt-country-in-the-world

“Chief Justice Roberts stated that, ‘The Supreme Court doesn’t make the laws. We just call balls and strikes’. That is wrong.” Especially when the current Supreme Court continuously calls out “strike!” even after a batter has obviously hit a home run. http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2010/01/2009-supreme-court-decisions-i-know.html
PPS: “So, Jane. What’s your moral here?” The moral here is that we need to protect the integrity of our court system at any cost — even if it means that a few more war profiteers have to go without one of their yachts. And also that I love all those Berkeley-Albany Bar Association luncheons.

December 16, 2013

Ye Old Scribe Presents: Joe McFuzzlepants Gets a New Cell Phone

Filed under: Uncategorized — Ye Olde Scribe @ 5:55 pm

Ye Olde’s Old Goat Quote

“Megyn Kelly saying Santa is white is like Cypher saying the Matrix is real.”-infamous net blogger A-non-E-moose

Ye Old Scribe Presents: Joe McFuzzlepants Gets a New Cell Phone

(more…)

December 15, 2013

Why life is like a football field

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , — Jane Stillwater @ 12:57 am

While watching football games on TV, we see players charge into danger, get their bodies beaten all to hell by opponents, injure their knees, walk away with “shaken baby syndrome” and sometimes even break a few bones — yet despite all this mayhem, players always seem to be having a whole bunch of fun at the same time.

And life too is like that — or at least it could be. Life always throws all kinds of obstacles in our paths. “Bad things happen.” You can always expect them like clockwork. That’s just the way life is. And you can then fold under the weight of it all — or you can look at the future with undisguised glee, with the same attitude as football players. Charge ahead. Grin. Enjoy the game!

Life is a contact sport, guys. Let’s suit up.

PS: The current challenge that life is handing me right now is how to deal with the pain of an abscessed tooth. You can’t just get your teeth fixed on Medi-Cal any more http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2009/06/california-famous-for-its-rotting-teeth.html. Plus even finding someone to pull it out for less than a small fortune is a Herculean task. What to do? FaceBook to the rescue! Here’s some examples of the good advice I’ve received from Team FaceBook:

“Put salt on it.”

“Soak it in whiskey.”

“Use Theodent chocolate toothpaste. It’s better than fluoride.”

“Go to Highland Hospital or the UCSF school of dentistry. They will pull it for cheap.”

“Do one of those dental-tourism thingies.” Sorry, no use. At this point in time, I can’t afford to do one of those. http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2010/09/dental-tourism-price-of-saving-tooth.html.

But this suggestion is my favorite: “Tie a string to a door.”

In any case, here’s me, facing the future squarely, charging boldly down the field. A trip to the UCSF School of Dentistry revealed that a former root canal on my tooth had been done wrong, that the tooth was now unsalvageable and that I could gladly pay them $15 Tuesday for an extraction appointment today. “Score!”

But then a trip to San Francisco’s beautiful old Ferry Building on the way home helped a lot to distract me from thoughts of the coming ordeal. And, of course, images of the Tooth Fairy possibly leaving enough money under my pillow to pay for an implant — that also helped.

And now I’m all getting ready for life’s next challenging scrimmage — because you can always guarantee that it won’t ever be long before the next one comes along.

PPS: And speaking of scrimmages, it looks like we are all going to be having Big Fun dealing with the next huge challenge life is throwing our way — trying to stop the human race from going belly-up in the near future due to climate change. According to journalist Tim Donovan, a climate-change apocalypse is already on its way here. http://www.salon.com/2013/12/02/thanks_for_killing_the_planet_boomers/

“Last week,” says Donovan, “I argued that it’s wholly unrealistic to assume humanity will undertake the massive, world-changing, economy-disrupting policy solutions needed for us to even stand a chance of long-term survival. Given that our local political and economic systems are as fragile, stalled and polarized as they’ve been in most of American history, these predictions only seem more dire, and the problem only more intractable.” http://www.salon.com/2013/12/09/we_are_deluding_ourselves_the_apocalypse_is_coming_and_technology_cant_save_us/

I have two thoughts on this terrible situation. First, a good apocalypse will surely take my mind off my poor abscessed tooth! And it might even take the GOP’s mind off of Benghazi and ObamaCare too. Hey, it could happen. Rove and Eric Canter and the Koch brothers will finally stop fretting about the CIA and the ACA — because they will be dead like the rest of us! Sorry, guys, but your flashy new bunkers and greedy bank vaults full of moola won’t save you either.

And, second, in order to save the world from those evil corporatist Nazi bastards during WWII, we Americans mobilized everything we had, even down to planting victory gardens in our smallest back yards. And now we need to do that exact same kind of extreme mobilization again today — in order to save the world from itself!

PPPS: I myself have never particularly liked football — until the other day, when I met Colin Kaepernick. What a nice guy. Now all I gotta say is, “Go Niners!” Or at least until they sell out and move down to Santa Clara. And “Go Raiders” too — for as long as they stay in Oakland where they belong.

December 8, 2013

Berkeley writers: Famous authors from my home town

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , — Jane Stillwater @ 3:47 pm

Way back in 1972, I found myself really struggling to find a place for myself in the new Nixon America, both philosophically and economically. The 1960s were clearly over and nobody wanted to hire me — either as a hippie single mother or as a female city planner with a masters degree from Cal. The days of Johnson’s Great Society and Urban Removal were gone completely and monies that used to go to improve our urban infrastructure had all been consumed in a fire called the Vietnam War. Plus planning departments throughout the land were mostly hiring only men “because they had families to support”. Hey, me too!

And so I decided to go to a hypnotist who would then ask my subconscious mind for advice on the subject of, “What should I do with my life?” What am I good at? And the answer came back so definitively clear that it startled me.

“You are a WRITER,” screamed my subconscious. Go figure. Or maybe it had said, “Righter,” meaning a person who seeks justice and to put things to right. Or perhaps both.

And 40 years later, here I am — constantly writing my little heart out. So my subconscious mind was clearly on target. And I am also now living in a city that is famous for its writers (and Righters too): Berkeley, California. So I decided to go for a walk and check out the places where these famous writers had lived.

Alan Ginsberg lived at 1624 Milvia Street when he wrote “Howl”. And he also used to come over to visit my friends at the Woolsey Street House and hang out with Country Joe McDonald, Chogyam Trungpa and the Floating Lotus Magic Opera.

Jack Kerouac lived at 1943 Berkeley Way. Philip K. Dick lived at 1126 Francisco Street and worked at the Lucky Dog pet shop http://www.berkeleyside.com/2012/07/17/a-roadmap-to-berkeleys-literary-scene/.  The list goes on and on. Ursula Le Guin, Robert Penn Warren, Joan Didion, Huey Newton, Anthony Boucher, June Jordan, Michael Chabon… All of them had homes in Berkeley.

But then I got to thinking about all the other residents — writers, Righters or not — currently living in Berkeley who do NOT have any homes. James, the writer who lives on the sidewalk in front of Jon’s ice cream shop, for instance. He has no home. And there are many, many, many others too — writers or not — who now live on our streets, unprotected and constantly at the mercy of weather, economic downturns, criminal minds and bad luck.

And these are only the homeless people in Berkeley that I’m talking about. All across America today there are thousands — probably even millions — of potential writers (and Righters) who are now (involuntarily) On The Road.

The strange and cancerous growth of homelessness in America since Jimmy Carter should surely give me something to write about. And should give you something to write about too. For instance, you could write to your congressional representative and tell him or her to stop spending our money on sleazy bank bailouts and stupid wars and start spending it on housing and schools instead. Who knows? Perhaps somewhere out there, homeless and afraid and without an education, is America’s next William Faulkner, Mark Twain or Janet Evanovich! http://www.ted.com/conversations/9175/less_than_1_paid_for_the_worl.html

PS: Didn’t Mark Twain live in Berkeley too? Or at least visit here a lot? I know that he left his memoirs to the University of California.

PPS: Here is an article I wrote back in 2007 after my visit to Nelson Mandela’s home town, Soweto, back when I was in the Peace Corps in South Africa. “Up the ‘Bucs!” http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2007/09/u-p-bucs-visiting-south-africas-soweto.html

And another article I wrote about Mandela’s relationship to Lucas Mangope, uncrowned king of the Setswana, who lived in my South African home town. http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2007/09/lucas-mangope-one-of-south-africas.html

December 6, 2013

Down for the Rapture?

Filed under: Uncategorized — Ye Olde Scribe @ 9:39 am

Soon you’ll be toast.

YES, this kitsch is a REAL product.

November 29, 2013

Do unto Syria as you would have Syria do unto you

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , — Jane Stillwater @ 11:51 pm

While walking through the streets of San Francisco the other day and totally admiring this beautiful city’s “painted lady” architectural glory, I suddenly and inexplicably started wondering what this amazing place might look like if it too had been bombed all to crap in the same manner that Damascus has been bombed to all to crap by all those missiles and cluster-bombs and Al Qaeda operatives — that American taxpayers are paying for — as they happily torture, rape and/or maim women and children in our name.

And this sudden unexpected vision of beautiful San Francisco as a bombed-out ruin has even further strengthened my resolve to do everything that I can to prevent America’s ruthless War Street from spending our money on bombing other countries — lest something like this happens to our beloved San Francisco too. Or to my own beloved Berkeley.

We need to stop all this expensive, bloody and worthless slaughter and seriously consider a far, far better alternative instead: “Do unto Syria what we would have Syria do unto us.”

And let’s also consider what corporate America’s current utter lack of a “Do unto Africa as we would have Africa do unto us” policy would do to us here if it also was reversed? Can you even imagine what it would be like in America if what happens in Africa today daily was happening here too? Really? Would we Americans love to be perpetually in debt to the world bank, have our lands and resources seized by neo-colonialists, our crops polluted with GMOs, millions of our women and children raped and killed, and our pristine forests turned into a dumping ground for nuclear and industrial waste? Hardly. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yydDBl_UlpQ&feature=youtu.be

And while we’re at it, let’s also “Do unto Israel as we would have Israel do unto us.” America’s relationship to Israel right now sucks eggs for the Israelis. And what exactly is this relationship? It might be easier to understand if we look at it from a different perspective and if our roles were reversed.

Imagine, for instance, that some huge gonzo super-power on the other side of the world was pumping billions and billions and billions of dollars into America’s economy annually — but with only one stipulation: That all this gigantic wad of free Moola can only be used for one purpose: To kill, torture, maim and and jail Native Americans. And steal their land. And establish an American Gestapo defense force and fund SSettlers to take over what few Indian reservations we have left (after 19 million Native Americans have already been slaughtered here already), and to treat native Americans like animals and to napalm their children. And to do this all in the name of God. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gTrbVf6SrCc

Would we, as Native Americans — or even as just plain American citizens — see the cruelty and injustice in this? Or would we just sell out to all those big bucks thrown our way like the Israelis have; and just relax and glorify in the joy of having a vampire-like power over others who are completely at our mercy?

These same choices are the ones that America’s War Street is forcing Israelis to make every day. And so far, most Israelis seem to have chosen blood-money over the Ten Commandments. What a waste.

And also let’s consider another new perspective: “Do unto nature and the environment what we would have nature and the environment do unto us.” Always remember that Nature bats last. Think Fukushima. Think a thousand more hurricanes like Sandy, Haiyan and Katrina. More fracking earthquakes. More 140-degree days. “Admiral Samuel J. Locklear III, the commander of the United States Pacific Command, [stated] that global climate change was the greatest threat the United States faced — more dangerous than terrorism, Chinese hackers and North Korean nuclear missiles.” http://opinionator.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/11/10/learning-how-to-die-in-the-anthropocene/?src=recg&_r=3&

And America’s War Street and Wall Street and related skin-flint tax-dodging huge corporations are obviously not clear on the concept of “Do unto Americans as you would have Americans do unto you” either.

In the 1940s, every American sacrificed their comfort and rationed their goods and went without in order to pay for the “Good War”.

But ever since that stupid and useless invasion of Afghanistan in 2001, 99% of Americans are sacrificing and going without in order to pay for some stupid and useless “Endless War” that in no way benefits them — while America’s top one percent make no sacrifices at all; dining on caviar, buying cruise-ship-sized yachts with their bloody “war” profits and fiddling like Nero. http://readersupportednews.org/opinion2/277-75/20603-business-elites-are-waging-brutal-class-war-in-america.

And yet most Americans these days do nothing to protect themselves from being cheated, robbed and exploited, but rather spend their last decaying days as citizens of a formerly economically-viable democracy happily watching pseudo-myths and fables on Fox News — as our beloved country slowly slips into third-world status. “Welcome to Jakarta.” http://www.counterpunch.org/2013/11/22/chilean-socialism-1-indonesian-fascism-0/

Are we finally getting the Big Picture here yet — that what goes around comes around? If Americans continue to let Wall Street and War Street run our domestic policies, our foreign policies and our environmental policies, then all we can ever expect to receive is blood and carnage in return.

“The Bible tells us so.”

PS: Denmark, a country generally known to be a socialist/commie anti-war environmentally-conscious female-honoring democratic single-payer Tea-Party nightmare, has just been declared “The Happiest Country on Earth”. However, you will find no countries at all that are currently under the sway of corporate America at the top of this Happy List — not even America itself. And definitely not any countries that corporate War Street has invaded in the last 40 years! http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/10/22/denmark-happiest-country_n_4070761.html

But changing from one economic system such as America’s current Corporate Welfare state to another such as Denmark’s economic democracy is clearly not going to help us either http://www.truth-out.org/opinion/item/20254-meet-americas-biggest-welfare-queens. We need to make even bigger changes, and go from using any economic system for judging our success and failure — to utilizing a philosophical system instead, one such as “Do unto others…”

November 20, 2013

Giants, fairies, Disneyland, war, archetypes: The role of mythology in our lives

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , — Jane Stillwater @ 12:44 pm

I want to go back to Disneyland! Who in their right mind wouldn’t want to return to a time when the Middle East was represented by flying carpets in the “Small World” ride instead of all those sad videos of dead babies that we now see on the news. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wW5D9PCWvOA

And even in today’s modern world, there are still myths and legends in our lives that motivate us, spur us on and keep us going — such as the myth of the Good War, the hero, the Patriot, the soldier and all those Marvel superheroes who stand between us and our worst nightmares.

And then there are the nightmares themselves.

But on the other hand, we also have many sweet, gentle myths and archetypes that enhance our world and bring us gifts of love — such as the good fairies who grant us three wishes, the Three Wise Men, and Glinda the Good Witch of the North. “You’re capable of more than you know…”

“Please read me another story from the fairy tale book,” says my granddaughter Mena every night before bedtime. She loves fairy tales. They help to explain a confusing adult world to her in a way that a five-year-old can understand. The wicked witch in Hansel and Gretel. Monster High’s cool DracuLaura. The town musicians of Bremen, the three little pigs. Parents as giants, towering over kids. Or even when Mena was a hero herself, during a deadly asthma attack last year. Fairy tales help Mena to understand that there are both good guys and bad guys in the world — and that the good guys sometimes actually win.

Then we have all those other myths and archetypes which are deliberately created by clever PR campaigns, ones that make us believe that if only we buy this fabulous 4G high-speed cell phone or that sexy high-speed car, we too will become a Hero. Not so, sadly. All we really are doing is speeding up the death of the Earth as we know it. And our deaths too.

And did I forget to mention the myth of War? That if you can just kill enough people, then Might will make Right. Where mass murder becomes sanctioned and even glorified. Where “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth” becomes a tooth in exchange for a thousand cemeteries http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I2SLvkUE8B0&feature=c4-overview&list=UUucnzI3V8FZgfgIXkxMqiqA. What a bloody lie. I myself prefer the “Love thy neighbor as thyself” myth much better. Plus it’s far easier than trying to get blood stains out of the carpet once all those murderous Heroes have moved on to the next Good War.

And then, of course, there is the myth (and the reality) of our own evil twin. I just finished reading a book called “The Tools,” which advises us to harness the power of each person’s evil twin in order to make them our allies instead, and to help us do Good. Good luck with that one.

Bottom line: Legends and myths and fairy tales and giants and archetypes all come from somewhere deep within the dark reaches of our individual subconscious minds. And these myths and archetypes have an important role to play in our lives. I’m just saying. Ignore them at your own peril. Or else try to take advantage of them — before they take advantage of you.

PS: Am currently reading two fairy tales for adults: “Summerland” by Michael Chabon and “Stardust” by Neil Gaiman. Will let you know how they turn out. And am also trying to figure out how to win the lottery so I can go back to Iraq with Hinterland Travel next October http://www.hinterlandtravel.com/iraq_upcoming.htm, to see where they wrote “1,001 Nights”.

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