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February 23, 2009

This Day in Hell: Santelli Someone Who Cares

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , — RS Janes @ 5:30 pm

February 23, 2040. CNBC’s Rick Santelli arrives in Hell and is offered a luxurious 10-bedroom, 4-bath mansion at a low mortgage rate. “Oh, boy! Wotta deal!” he shouts as he snaps it up and moves in, but a month later, the mortgage doubles. It keeps doubling every month until Santelli finally complains to the Devil: “You can’t just double my mortgage every month. That’s unfair!” “Just where do you think you are, Rick?” “That’s not the point – every place, even here, has to have some rules governing mortgage rates!” “That’s tough, Rick, but that’s the free market for you.” “But I can’t possibly earn enough to pay this inflated mortgage!” “What are you, Rick, some kind of loser?” Later, the foreclosed-on Rick is given a minimum wage job cleaning J.P. Morgan’s underwear with a pipe cleaner and lives in his ‘Hell car’ – a rusted-out 1988 Plymouth Horizon with four flat tires and no engine that rents for $800 a month.

February 22, 2009

The Tattlesnake — Mantan of Steele Edition

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , , , , — RS Janes @ 8:31 am

Spike Lee’s Fictional Film Character is Now Chairman of the GOP

I thought the brilliant Richard Pryor had left us, but he must be back writing speeches now for ‘the white man’s black man’ Michael Steele. How else do you account for all the satirical comedy emanating from this guy? Going after the votes of “one-armed midgets,” “urban-suburban” hip-hoppers, and calling the GOP “way beyond cutting edge” (isn’t that like a cartoon character running in mid-air before he falls ‘splat’ to the ground)? Hilarious! Sure, and don’t forget this gem: “Not in the history of mankind has the government ever created a job.” Hey, Mike, tell that to a cop, a firefighter, a postal worker, or a soldier just returned from Iraq – they all think they have jobs and, what’s more, they all pay taxes and buy things from private companies which, last I checked, stimulates the economy. (For that matter, who’s been cutting former Lt. Gov. Steele’s paychecks in the past?) And I’m sure the party of Strom Thurmond, Jesse Helms and David Duke will appreciate Steele pursuing “moms of all shapes” in his lust to expand the GOP base. Sheesh, he’s like Godfrey Cambridge in “Watermelon Man.” (I guess it’s also possible he’s on drugs, because he sure appears to be hallucinating in public.)

“Get jiggy with the GOP”? Most people would rather hug a poisonous cobra.

At least he’ll be entertaining until he’s replaced in 2011 after the GOP racks up even more losses in Congressional and state elections. His predecessor as RNC Chair, Mike “Huh?” Duncan, was a typical dull, cookie-cutter Republican twit; Steele, by contrast, is ding-dong, spittle-lipped crazy.

Thank you, Jebas.

February 19, 2009

Ye Olde Scribe Productions Presents: Cleaning Out Most of the YOS Closet

Filed under: Uncategorized — Ye Olde Scribe @ 7:18 pm

You may have noticed, gentle reader, that Ye Olde has been missing for more than a few weeks. From deep inside his anti-Archie Bunker he has been recovering from one big party induced headache. If only Junior and Biggus had been led away in chains Scribe woulda partied so hardy he’d still be zithered.

He came out of his bunker and found a big rainbow. Damn Jesse Jackson Coalition. Not that? Created by the Rainbow People? Damn hippies. Not that? Oh, nobody’s Mama Obama actually WON!?!? The birds were all a twittering. No? That was the sound of some regressive progressives on the Left sharpening their knives; you know, that “special” back stabbing cutlery already stained with the blood of Al Gore, Bill and Hillary Clinton?

Well, anywhosiewhatsis, all this time Scribe has been gathering quotes, links and other specters pleasurable; and not so. Time to examine what Scribe saved. Perhaps you will find a few gems amongst the expelled roughage…

Spooky Quotes
“Haunting the Net Since February 19th, 2009.”

What did I do wrong? I did more to protect my Mistress than Junior ever did to protect his country from bin Laden.

-Ghost of a Dead Chimp
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February 12, 2009

Republican Heaven

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , — Bob Patterson @ 4:43 pm

Muslim warriors believe that when they die, 72 virgins will be waiting in heaven for them to arrive.

Republicans believe that when they get to heaven all social programs will be eliminated as a cost saving measure and their taxes will be reduced to zero.

Last weekend, the headline for the L. A. Times Sunday late edition hinted that the Republicans are just about to get to heaven and begin the “uber-fun” phase of their program. Soon, the Republicans will hardly be able to contain their glee while seeing the look on liberals faces when the cutting of funds for social programs begins. If that isn’t heaven for them, then it’s impossible to say what would be.

The costs of the wars America is fighting will have to be covered. Police and firemen have to be on duty and be paid. Other than that, it is becoming obvious that the budgets for city, county, and state agencies have reached the “cut or die” breaking point. Either they cut programs or the programs and the state budgets will go completely out of control..

Republicans have always been sickened by the costs that social programs add to the various government budgets and have strongly urged that they be eliminated. Now, thanks to the Bush budget legacy, President Obama will have to be at the helm when many “unnecessary social programs” “take the bullet” and are sacrificed to cut overall costs.

Rush Limbaugh will use this disparity to goad members of various minorities into resenting the coincidence that Obama happened to be President when it happened, and el Rushbo will urge them to take out their resentment of Obama at the voting polls when the next elections are held.

Republican officer holders can shrug, mumble the “compassionate conservative” nonsense, and stifle their mirth, while “going along with Obamas’s cuts.”

Cuts which follow the approval of a stimulus package will seem (to those affected) especially galling and Rush will be sure to stir up the maximum possible amount of resentment among the Democrats.

In essence George W. Bush has dismantled the New Deal and has managed to do so in a way that will (for many) make it seem like President Obama is the culprit. The last vestige of the New Deal left to remove is Social Security and the Republicans are willing to wait another term or two before making the elimination of Social Security a move that is a “critical necessity.”

The Republicans have always hated “the New Deal” and watching the elimination of all the social programs they hate will be like life in heaven for those compassionate conservatives who never did like FDR.

January 29, 2009

Why should he?

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , — Bob Patterson @ 3:18 pm

There doesn’t seem to be much commentary available on-line, in the way of handicapping the odds about whether Karl Rove will or will not show up Tuesday and testify.

He can:
Show up and lie. Not good for him if it turns out that it can be proved he lied.
Show up and take the Fifth Amendment. It will seem like an echo of the Senate Rackets Committee hearings in the past when the gangsters made taking the fifth a cliche and that won’t be good for Bush’s image or legacy.

He can:
Not show up.

If he doesn’t show up, it can go either slow or fast.
If Rove doesn’t show up and fights it in court it could be a long legal battle which would fit the new Republican strategy of delay, disrupt, and destroy during the Obama term in office. It could take years to settle and that would get Bush off the hook.
It could go fast if the high priced Republican lawyers put it on the fast track to the Supreme Court for a quick hearing to resolve a Constitutional Crisis. The Supreme Court has a conservative majority so that looks like the deck would be stacked in Rove’s favor.

The world’s laziest journalist, like most of the high paid pundits for the mainstream media, is too busy to think this through, so, dear reader, think it through and, if you can, post a comment below on how you think it will play out.

January 23, 2009

The Tattlesnake – Random Notes on Bush’s Exit, Obama’s Entrance, and the Dying of the Right Edition

Part the One

– Wow. Obama’s been president for three days and already he’s signed Executive Orders closing Gitmo; banning torture; suspending those odious ‘military tribunal’ trials; ending revolving-door lobbying; preventing lobbyists from occupying senior positions in agencies they once lobbied; requiring ethics courses for all of his staff (and he took the course himself); limiting the use of secrecy classification, even imposing Justice Department oversight on his ability to classify documents secret; and expanded government transparency, directing his administration to err on the side of Freedom of Information Act requests rather than the other way around. He also froze the pay of senior White House staff and informed them that as long as he’s president, none of them will quit and then turn around and lobby their friends still in his government, reversing years of Bush/Cheney corruption, sleaze, secrecy and illegality.

What’s more, he did all of this while acting like a grown-up, speaking in full, clear, grammatical sentences, and taking his job seriously. It will be difficult, but pleasant, to adjust to a president who doesn’t have a smirk perpetually playing about his mouth, doesn’t need someone else to run his brain, and can think on his feet. We’ve gone from Barney Fife to Denzel Washington, and the change is striking. I’ll be criticizing Obama in the future I’m sure, but for now all I can say is: Wow. I think he’s one of those rare politicians who really meant what he said when he was campaigning.

– The Dying of the Right 1: While the vast majority of America is celebrating our new competent president, the peevish drones over at Fox News, led by Chris “My Dad’s the Journalist!” Wallace, have been foaming at the mouth over whether Obama’s really president, since Supreme Court Chief Justice John Roberts bumbled the reading of the oath on January 20th and Obama followed him. This is the largest load of unprocessed fertilizer since the questioning of Obama’s birth certificate. (Hint to all the ‘reporters’ at Fox: As well as the certificate itself, long available online and sanctioned as genuine by fact-checking organizations, there was also a birth announcement in the Honolulu Advertiser newspaper welcoming Barack H. Obama Jr. into the world in 1961.) In fact, the law says that, as the victor in the last election, Obama was officially president at Noon last Tuesday, whether he was sworn in or not, and documents were signed after the inaugural ceremony signifying that official transfer of power. Just to head off frivolous lawsuits from tinfoil-hat pinheads, Obama had Roberts drop by the White House the next day and redo the swearing in. Incredibly, some of the bloviating scoundrels claimed this was a – oooohhhh — ‘secret ceremony’! Horse pucky. The press was invited in, still photos were taken and an audio track was recorded – it was as secret as an American Idol audition. Only the TV cameras weren’t involved, and that was likely because Obama wanted this formality completed quickly and didn’t want to get bogged down with silly questions from the Usual Media Meatheads like Fox News. (“Mr. President, will you now come clean about your place of birth? Weren’t you really born in Kenya or Cuba or Mexico? Isn’t it true that Patrice Lumumba is your real father and Squeaky Fromme is your real mother?” )

– The Dying of the Right 2: Rush “Rhymes with Limbo” Limbaugh, who once went apoplectic criticizing liberals as ‘unpatriotic America-haters’ because he had convinced himself they wanted the Little King to fail in Iraq, has now joined the ranks of unpatriotic America-haters, according to his lights. On his radio show the other day, he confessed openly, “I hope Obama fails.” Aside from the fact that about 83 percent of the public doesn’t agree with him, even some the brain-dead rubes who still give any credence to the great blubbery gasbag, suffering under the GOP economy and dying in the senseless Republican wars Rushbo helped peddle, had to be appalled by this statement. He wants the country to go down the drain to what – make the era of conservative Republicans look good? That’s some patriot; George Washington would be proud. Prediction: This is the sort of nasty, psychotic hypocrisy that is losing ratings for the neocon hustlers of the broadcast media and it’s going to result in Limbo being dropped from the airwaves across the country. In eight years, Rush will have lost his syndication deal and will end his miserable existence shouting through a tin can at a little 1000-watt daytimer in North Peckerwood, Alabama. (“Hey, Limbaugh, y’all forgot to take out the trash from the studio last night!” “I’ll get it, boss, I’ll get it!” “Yeah, and don’t forget to mop them washrooms extra good while you’re at it.” )

– Laugh-A-Bullroar: If you were watching the inaugural ceremonies on CNN or MSNBC, did you notice they cut the mics picking up the crowd sounds when Bush, Cheney and the Republicans were introduced? And the band was cranked up extra loud to try and drown out the tidal wave of booing. Earlier in the day, even addle-pated ‘Morning’ Joe Scarborough remarked on the two to three million Obama fans flooding into Washington that the GOP had better pay attention to this political shift or risk being the minority party far into the future. Forget Dimmy and Dick, they’re gone, but I wonder if those Congressional Republicans got the point? (Some of them nearly lost their safe seats last election.)

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January 20, 2009

The Tattlesnake — Bush: The Way of All Flash Edition

The End of An Irritant

Rational people, when faced with a massive failure of their own making, normally take some time for private circumspection and avoid further contact with the public, at least until the outrage of the torch-wielding villagers has subsided. But that’s not our Crawford Dauphin, whose capacity for realistic introspection is String Theory microcosmic while his unrefined chutzpah remains as large and lumbering as his political party’s logo.

Such is the case with this recent series of cringe-inducing Bush ‘exit interviews’ wherein Our Worst President Ever insists on trying to polish a turd that was flushed away years ago in the receding waters of 2005′s Hurricane Katrina. Even with the prodigious help of future cellmates like Karl Rove and Dick Cheney, assiduously applying the spit shine of hastily rewritten history to the ‘Bush Legacy Project’ (a slim library containing the works of Niccolo Machiavelli, Chuck Palahniuk’s “Stranger Than Fiction,” a copy of George Orwell’s “1984″ annotated in red ink by Lee Atwater, tracts by Aimee Semple McPherson, the collected speeches of Father Charles Coughlin and Herbert Hoover, and, of course, the paint-by-number version of “My Pet Goat”) the Little President That Couldn’t continues to maintain approval ratings that read like an Iowa thermometer in January.

Bush, in his stubbornly obtuse inability to recognize the spreading stain when he’s wet his pants, admits to few mistakes and those that he grudgingly examples are of such a pathetic and hilariously off-target nature that he must be moonlighting as a monologue writer for David Letterman.

In his last press conference (thank you, merciful Jeebus), he assigned as one of his mistakes the “Mission Accomplished” banner that decorated the space behind his head during his ludicrous publicity stunt aboard the aircraft carrier USS Abraham Lincoln in May of 2003. Neglecting to apologize for the pusillanimous White House fib that the banner was created by grateful sailors and not Rove’s relentless propaganda machine, this was characteristic of Junior’s endless fusillade of misguided missiles: The mistake was the banner — not the phony and unnecessary Hollywood PR stunt, not declaring a premature end to combat operations, not the trumped-up unnecessary war itself – just the banner.

This event encapsulates the entire eight years of Bush’s failed residency in the Oval Office. There was no reason, other than Rove’s fevered obsession with primping his oblivious client as some sort of war hero, to dress up the graying Bush as a young fighter jock and have him ferried to the carrier via Navy jet. Past presidents handled such ceremonies with a modicum of dignity in a civilian business suit and relied on a helicopter for transport – but then they didn’t need a flight deck and surrounding throng of ordered-to-be-there fawning sailors to indemnify their masculinity the way Junior does. A touch of cosmic comedy was added as President Top Gun forgot to release the crotch straps on his Fly Boy get-up; although apparently too dull to notice, or too inept to unhook them himself, the imperial testicles were no doubt reminded of the pain of command.

So this was the repeated play that Americans have been forced to witness for nearly a decade; a shambling, awkward boy-child, insecure in himself, incessantly pretending to be a simple, resolute man with the experience, virtue and wisdom to make the proper decisions and perpetually foiled by the forgotten crotch strap of reality biting into his flesh. Every pretend heroic moment has turned into a tragic farce, the stage set by Bush’s own words when he occasionally slipped and uttered the truth. Recall when Candidate Bush said he would be the “CEO president,” and that he was basically “a media creation”?

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January 14, 2009

The Tattlesnake – Anti-Mythmaking and Other Conundrums Edition

“Obviously, some of my rhetoric has been a mistake.”
– George W. Bush in what, we hope, is his final press conference.

SOME???

A Few Popular Media Myths Quickly Dispelled:

– There is not, and never has been, any such thing as ‘global free trade.’

– That we have, or have ever had, a ‘free market’ economy. (Another quaint media fiction that has never existed in reality.)

– There is not, and never has been, any such thing as a corporation that ‘cares.’ Corporations care about you to the extent that it facilitates freeing you from your money to buy their product or service; that is their only purpose in ‘caring’ about the customer at all. All else is marketing and public relations.

Laughable Bulls*it: Bush now admits the ‘Mission Accomplished’ banner was a mistake. Hmmm, was that the ‘Mission Accomplished’ banner prepared by the White House, or the one the Rove PR machine claimed was painted by the happy sailors aboard the carrier USS Abraham Lincoln that had nothing to do with the Bush Gang?

Ponderable: ‘In God We Trust’ is an interesting motto to stick on money. Think about it – if you really trusted God, you wouldn’t need money.

To All of the Geniuses on the Left Excoriating Obama: Word up, friends. It’s said Obama is a good poker player and a good poker player doesn’t show his cards until he’s ready. Next time you think to trash him before he’s even officially president, think for a moment: The guy is one of the smartest presidents we’ve ever had, and he put together an organization to get this far, against the odds; maybe he actually knows what he’s doing.

Not a Cheeseburger in Paradise: Burger King is currently featuring something called the ‘Angry Whopper’ spiced up with slices of jalapenos and pepper cheese to burn your tongue. Geez — fast food with emotions? What’s next, the ‘Big Mad Mac’ with bone splinters, White Castle’s ‘Snarly Slider’ with fingernail clippings, or Wendy’s ‘Ass-Kickin’ Mean Stack’ with pieces of real teeth? “Gimme one a them damn nasty burgers and make it snappy, jerk! Grrrrrrrr.”

January 8, 2009

The Tattlesnake –The Media Blago Jewell Show, Say It Ain’t So, Joe, and Other Low Blows Edition

Remember Richard Jewell? Back in 1996 he was the poor schlub who was convicted by the Big Media as the Atlanta Centennial Olympic Park bomber, based on a leaked story and innumerable FBI agents and other law enforcement experts appearing on TV practically guaranteeing the public that Jewell, by dint of proximity, false information from a former employer, and fitting an FBI ‘profile’ of lonely demented maniacs seeking heroic status, was the man who did it. They had everything but the formality of a conviction in a court of law. I recall several of our fellow citizens so outraged at the time over Jewell that they gladly would have stuck his chubby body on a spit and slow-roasted him to death. After all, everybody – the media, the punditry, the FBI, the guy tending bar –- KNEW he was guilty — he killed and maimed innocent people! — so why bother with a trial? Then the facts began to trickle out; the former employer had invented the disparaging remarks about Jewell’s character; the vaunted FBI ‘lone bomber’ profile – well, it was really just sheer speculation, after all. All the ‘proof of guilt’ left was that Jewell was in the area when the bomb exploded, along with hundreds of other people. The case was dropped due to lack of evidence and, finally, in 2005, the real perpetrator of the tragedy confessed – none other than Christopublican nutcase Eric Rudolph, who had made his name blowing up abortion clinics and gay bars because he believed that life was sacred. Jewell, who died in 2007 at age 44, sued for libel without complete success, and he never really got his reputation back – even an apology from AG Janet Reno didn’t help that. For those who need some help connecting the dots: These days, Illinois Governor Rod Blagojevich has been convicted by the Big Media based on the allegations of one man, Patrick Fitzgerald, with no independent evidence that he has done anything wrong. Everyone – the pundits, Democrats, the public, late-night comics – just KNOW Blago is guilty – why even bother with a trial? Yet, Fitzgerald needed, and received, an extension until April to bring indictments against Blago, whom he claimed was on a veritable ‘crime spree.’ In other words, he made a public announcement of sure guilt, and now he can’t even present a case to an indict-a-ham-sandwich grand jury? Something stinks here.

I’m not saying Blago is innocent; he might be the most corrupt politician since Boss Tweed for all I know, but it has to be proven in a court of law, not by prosecutorial press conferences nor the error-ridden scandalmongers of our national media. (These are, after all, the same solons who sold us on the Iraq disaster.) Note: Whenever you see this ‘convicted by the media’ shark-feeding in progress, just remember Richard Jewell.

See How They Roll: In a related item of Big Media heavy breathing over a scandal that wasn’t, let’s travel back through the mists of the past — or the ‘Clean Air’ pollution, if you will — to January of 2001 and the Bush Leaguers entering the White House. Remember the Big Scandal of the time was that departing Clinton staffers had trashed the place and pried up the ‘W’ on nearly every computer keyboard? Oh the moaning and groaning of the Right-Wing Wurlitzer and their stenographer pals in the White House Press Gang over how classless and horrible were the Clintonistas – why would they do something so childish and awful? Well, that was until the truth emerged – funny story, it was actually the Bushites who had quietly pushed the phony vandalism story to smear Bill Clinton and there was nothing more than normal office wear-and-tear left behind by his staff. Ha, ha. If you’re wondering why Obama and his family have been denied access to The Blair House, the traditional residence of soon-to-be-inaugurated presidents, even though it was empty until the Bushers hastily scheduled a one-night stopover for former Australia PM John Howard, here’s the proof that, not only is Junior the worst president we’ve ever had, but also the most peevish and vindictive. (Clinton left the presidency with a high approval rating, and Obama is entering it with a 70-some percent favorable rating and after winning a larger number of votes both electoral and popular than did Junior.) Incidentally, the Obama’s have been forced to stay at the Hay-Adams Hotel until January 15th, which is costing the taxpayers much more in security than if they had been living at The Blair. But, hey, who cares about the ‘little people’s’ money when it comes to pointlessly snubbing the democratically-elected president of the other party.

Laugh-A-Bull You Can’t Make Up: I know I promised never to mention him again, but this is too good: Joe the Plumber’s Helper, AKA Samuel Wurzelbacher of Lower Dipstick, Ohio, has stuck his unlicensed plunger back into the news stream as it was announced recently that he would be the new mighty-rightie Pajamas Media correspondent on – sit down and swallow that hot beverage – the Middle East! He even handed down this nugget of wisdom to a CNN affiliate on his assignment to Israel, “Being a Christian I’m pretty well protected by God I believe. That’s not saying he’s going to stop a mortar for me, but you gotta take the chance.” Perfecto! That’s just the kind of open-minded attitude we need in journalists providing information from that volatile region. Kudos to Pajamas Media for trying to burnish its credibility – or satirical value, anyway. (Hey, maybe Bob the Builder could be tapped to report on the housing market, or Thomas the Tank Engine on transportation? The possibilities are endless.)

Laugh-A-Bull the Deuce: Lady Laura Bird Bush just unveiled a new set of White House china that the incoming Obama family may or may not like. The set cost nearly a half-million bucks ($492,798 for 320 14-piece place settings) and, in these times when much of Mr. and Mrs. John Q. Heading-For-The-Poorhouse are eating uncooked Spam off of paper plates, seems a tad excessive. True, it was financed by private funds, and it’s American made, but still — hasn’t anybody told clueless Laura we’re in the most serious financial crisis since the Great Depression? “These plates are perfect for cake, if you can’t afford bread.”

Laugh-A-Pitbull: Finally, according to some outfit called Veterinary Pet Insurance, the most popular dog name in 2008 was ‘Max,’ and it was the most popular name for a cat, as well. The company’s employees also picked the most unusual pet names for 2008 (read the full list here); topping the list for cats, ‘Edward Scissorpaws’ (although I liked No. 4 ‘Buddha Pest’ better), and for dogs, ‘Rush Limbark.’

January 7, 2009

Let’s Focus on 2009

Filed under: Commentary,Uncategorized — Greg in cheeseland @ 4:49 pm

After a few weeks hiatus from politics, and a few weeks of travel, family, holidays, etc….I found myself thinking on New Year’s Eve, 2008. At that moment every year we get the opportunity to think about how we got where we are, how we can improve ourselves and how we can have a positive impact on the world around us.

2008 left America in the deepest recession since the Great Depression in the 30’s. A myriad of problems left by the last administration that have already led to a near economic collapse have barely begun to be addressed. It’s tempting to get cynical and lash out at the details of what our new administration has done and will do, instead of seeing the big picture and looking ahead. In times of stress, however, Americans tend to pull together.

I prefer to think of these difficulties as an opportunity not only to make significant changes in our society, but also in the way we think about our society. Piecemeal, patchwork, incremental plans won’t be enough to solve the problems that our country faces. Only a new vision can erase the failures of the past eight years. The last time America faced such a challenge was in the 1930’s, and out of that came some of America’s boldest policies. Our 21st-century ideas must be as progressive and innovative as the ones that led us into the last half of that century. We need to restore confidence in our government through transparency, fairness and equity. Our economy must be enabled, or forced, to grow in a sustainable way. We need to put our resources into helping those most in need within our borders, and elect representatives that represent the desires of our community for a safe, sustainable, forward-looking society.

So, how do we do that?  (more…)

January 6, 2009

The Tattlesnake – Them That’s Got and Stan Getz Edition

And This Day in Hell…

“Them that’s got shall get,
Them that’s not shall lose…”

– From “God Bless the Child (That’s Got His Own),” by Arthur Herzog Jr. and Billie Holiday, and recorded by her for Okeh Records in 1941.

“Free market capitalism — as a faith — really is an inverse of Marxism. It is a theology that believes their system will bring paradise on earth and moral perfection. When their system is in power in the real world, their true believers claim that any problem only happened because their ideology has not been applied with sufficient purity.”
– Larry Beinhart, “The Fall of a Free Market Prophet,” Common Dreams, Dec. 7, 2008.

“Sometimes the Invisible Hand is all thumbs.”
– Jared Bernstein, C-Span, April 16, 2008.

“The first panacea for a mismanaged nation is inflation of the currency; the second is war. Both bring a temporary prosperity; both bring a permanent ruin. But both are the refuge of political and economic opportunists.”
– Ernest Hemingway [Bush reversed the formula, but it's still true today.]

So far we’ve seen the Top Dogs – underline ‘dogs’ – of Wall Street and Detroit parade before Congress insisting they need our tax money to bail them out. The former ‘Masters of the Universe’ have made so many stupid short-term decisions they have shamed their MBA parchment into so much worthless sheepskin accorded to those who can pay the tuition, or have the family clout, to squeeze them through college. To add insult to injury, the bankers who have fleeced us for billions in the name of providing credit to keep businesses going have refused to use our money to provide credit to keep businesses going, instead financing bonuses for themselves, luxury retreats at pricey resorts, and apparently precipitating a sit-down strike by 300 union workers at a Republic Windows and Doors factory in Chicago last month. Not only were these people unceremoniously fired and given one day to clear out, the company reneged on its contract to provide wages and vacation pay owed them and the severance pay they were guaranteed. That’s right – Republic refused to pay wages and vacation pay already earned and blamed it on the Bank of America, while they hastily moved their Chicago equipment to Iowa. BoA received $25 billion of our tax dollars to avoid just this kind of situation. Fortunately, thanks to nationwide publicity for this sit-down strike, and support from near-President Obama, the Republic workers finally received their back wages and other pay, but let’s see this for what it was: A naked attempt to bust the union, and it was mostly successful. Republic’s union workers are still out of a job and the company has set up a low-wage non-union plant in Iowa. (Incidentally, inquiring minds would like to know: who is paying the salaries of Republic’s top executives and how much do they make?)

Morality and ethics hardly exist in the corporate boardroom but, if this isn’t wrong, what is?

How to correct it? Let’s hope President Obama takes a page from Franklin D. Roosevelt, especially his Economic Bill of Rights speech delivered January 11, 1944, during the Second World War, which included:

The right to a useful and remunerative job in the industries or shops or farms or mines of the nation;

The right to earn enough to provide adequate food and clothing and recreation;

The right of every farmer to raise and sell his products at a return which will give him and his family a decent living;

The right of every businessman, large and small, to trade in an atmosphere of freedom from unfair competition and domination by monopolies at home or abroad;

The right of every family to a decent home;

The right to adequate medical care and the opportunity to achieve and enjoy good health;

The right to adequate protection from the economic fears of old age, sickness, accident, and unemployment;

The right to a good education.

As FDR concluded: “All of these rights spell security. And after this war is won we must be prepared to move forward, in the implementation of these rights, to new goals of human happiness and well-being.

“America’s own rightful place in the world depends in large part upon how fully these and similar rights have been carried into practice for our citizens.”

If we have those rights, the economy will take care of itself.

What Does Late Jazz Sax Player Stan Getz Have to Do with Our Economic Meltdown? Read on:

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January 1, 2009

The Tattlesnake – The Good, The Bad and The Ugly of 2008 Edition

Coverage of the Big Stuff of 2008, in the form of cheesy top ten lists and lofty-worded think pieces, will be churned out endlessly by Our Corporately-Owned Media over the next few weeks, so here are some of the lesser-reported annoyances, intrusions on sanity, and other head-smackers of the year past.

The Good: It’s a new year and Obama takes office in less than 20 days! (Happy 2009, BTW.)
The Bad: Bush and Cheney can still stir up trouble in their ‘Final Days.’
The Ugly: What if they decide not to leave?

The Good: The already-weakened Republican Party is splitting apart in a war between the ‘Jesus Camp’ Christopublicans and the Neocon Corporate Pragmatists. (The true principled conservatives having ditched the GOP years ago.) The latter are willing to bend rather than break; the former can’t, since they arrogantly believe, apparently without the assistance of hard drugs, that their Invisible Omnipotent God of the Infinite Universe Who Hates Liberals and Homos has nothing better to do than whisper in their ears what kind of retail politics and holy wars against his other creations will set them straight with Heaven.
The Bad: There’s a good chance the NCP will dump the Republicans entirely and put all their money into the Dems, which will have the result of making the Dems as debased and corrupt as the GOP.
The Ugly: Even though the Theocrats-for-a-Better-Armageddon are a small minority, the GOP in their hairy paws will become a rural party of ranting rubes, bedeviled boobs, slick hicks, hypocritical hucksters, predatory politicians, snake-handling simpletons, and mumbling morons (not that it mostly isn’t already) and, thanks to our unique system of apportioning two senators to each state no matter what the population (another nasty legacy of the era of slavery), the Christopublicans will continue to wield enough influence to block legislation and stir up other governmental mischief to the detriment of us all. The future of the Republican Party might very well be an army of pious Puritan dunderheads marching in righteous lockstep, infecting the US body politic like a bad case of psoriasis – it won’t kill you, but it can be damned aggravating.

The Good: Speaking of Sarah Palin, her 18-year-old daughter Bristol had a healthy baby recently.
The Bad: As Bart of Bartcop fame wrote, “[Sarah] Palin promised her daughter ‘and the young man’ would get married but that was during the campaign so she can’t be held to it.” So, now that Bristol’s bun is out of the oven, where is the fuming outrage of the Big Media and the Christopublicans that she’s officially an unwed mother and, since Ma holds down a gub’mint job, she’s being supported by taxpayer money?
The Ugly: The kid’s father, Levi Johnston, remains a proudly ignorant redneck oaf, and he just went to work for a ‘let’s-rape-the-wilderness’ energy company.

The Good: A Democrat has finally vowed to fight back against Republican smears and refuses to cave in to their demands.
The Bad: That Democrat is the convicted-by-the-media-without-a-trial Governor of Illinois, Rod Blagojevich.
The Ugly: Here is the dumb-bunny guilt-by-location smear the RNC and every right-wing website will be repeating ad nauseum as long as Obama is president, even if Blago is cleared of all charges: “Obama and Blagojevich are both from Chicago, Illinois, which is, like, the most corrupt city and state in the union – the FBI guy said so! – and, hey, common sense says they must both then be completely corrupt, right? This is another one of those unanswered questions about Obama that the public deserves to hear the full truth about!” 2010 BM pundit’s comment: “Let’s say ‘hello’ to Illinois’ newly-elected Republican Governor Patrick Fitzgerald! At least he’s ethical, even if he couldn’t convict Blagojevich of anything!”

The Good: Illinois finally has a US Senator to replace Obama, a man with a clean and honorable record, former IL Attorney General Roland Burris.
The Bad: He is being morphed into Blago’s Rev. Wright by the scandal-happy ‘Whitewaterized’ Big Media, eager to toss him into the same ‘guilty-even-if-he-hasn’t-been-convicted-of-anything’ pot with Blagojevich. Burris is now ‘tainted’ just because he accepted the appointment. Note to the Big Media: What about all of those prominent Washington Senators of the Republican persuasion – Mitch McConnell, John Ensign, Saxby Chambliss, Richard Shelby, Orrin Hatch, et al — who openly dined and danced with the likes of Jack Abramoff and Karl Rove? Oh, right – Rove hasn’t been convicted of any crime – but when has that stopped you? (Hey, the Clintons weren’t convicted of any crime in the Whitewater land deal; and no crime was even committed in the ‘Travelgate’ fiasco, but that didn’t matter – they were still media-created ‘scandals’ that filled up newspaper columns and media airtime for years.) Lack of conviction, so to speak, certainly hasn’t been any bar to gleefully drubbing Blagojevich and Burris with the corruption stick. Abramoff is in prison and Rove is being subpoenaed and investigated all over the place for bribery, fraud and other assorted dishonesty, yet their close connections to prominent Republicans, not to mention the White House, somehow doesn’t carry the same ‘taint’ of corruption? Is the BM afraid of the GOP High and Mighty, or is it just your ingrained conservative bias showing?
The Ugly: Congressional and Illinois state Democrats are incredibly doing the Republicans’ job for them, sticking the blade in deep and twisting it not only with Blago, but now Burris, too. Hey, dingbat Dems, a simple ‘innocent until proven guilty, it’s the American way’ would be the way to go.

There’s more below the fold…

(more…)

December 26, 2008

Pardons Imply Guilt

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , — Bob Patterson @ 5:57 pm

 Critics of President Bush expecting that he would issue pardons to his staff for any possible war crimes, underestimated the devious cunning of his advisers.  Not issuing the pardons may have been their greatest stroke of genius because it provides President Obama with a loose-loose decision.

If President Obama initiates a war crimes investigation, the conservative talk show hosts will unleash a propaganda counter-attack that will be a relentless stream of vitriol that will question Obama’s reasoning, sanity, and patriotism.  The attempts to formulate a program of change will become deadlocked in a debate about the need for any war crimes trials.

The Republicans will use the “innocent until proved guilty” dodge to sabotage every step of the investigation process.  (Note:  by that criteria, Hitler can not be considered a war criminal.)

If President Obama does not conduct a war crimes investigation, then the Republicans can claim that it constitutes a <I>de facto</I> “not guilty” verdict and closes the topic forever.

Imagine that Hitler didn’t commit suicide and that after the Allied victory, Hitler avoided being indicted for war crimes.  Wouldn’t his supporters have claimed that the fact he wasn’t put on trial meant that there wasn’t enough evidence for a conviction? 

Was there any chance that Hitler would have been given a pass due to good-sportsmanship?

If President Obama wants to form a consensus majority, he has to avoid a divisive trial.

If he advocates “forgive and forget,” then eventually the Republicans can use the fact that no trial was held as the basis for saying “if there were any war crimes, then Obama became an accessory after the fact by not holding any investigations.”  At that point the Obama administration will want to avoid any discussions about the possibility that war crimes may have been committed during Bush’s term in office.

Forgoing any Christmas pardons for the advisers who delivered the “weapons of mass destruction” rational for going to war, was clever raised to the third power.

President Bush didn’t issue any pardons and now the next move is up to President elect Obama because any pardons would have been seen as avoiding punishment for some wrong that had been committed.  Without pardons to denounce and decry, the next move is up to President Obama and he has other more important issues needing immediate attention.

So who do you think will win this year’s Best Motion Picture Oscar

Ned Kelly said:  “Such is life.”

Now, the disk jockey will play AC/DC’s song “Highway to Hell” and we will scram.  Have a “no harm, no foul” type week.

December 23, 2008

Questions about Gen. Patton’s Death

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , — Bob Patterson @ 5:39 pm

(Fremantle W. A.)  On Monday, Dec. 22, 2008, on page 16, the Western Australian newspaper ran a story about a new book, “Target Patten,” written by Robert Wilson, described as a military historian, which suggests that the Office of Strategic Services may have deliberately staged an automobile accident that critically injured General George S. Patton and that subsequently the Americans may have ignored a Russian assassination plot against the injured American general.
The article, datelined Washington D. C., recounts the fact that the driver of the truck that hit the car carrying Patton was whisked out of the area and that no autopsy was performed.
The story provides the historic background for the death because many Americans were displeased with the famous American general because of his criticism of the Russians and the decision to let them be the ones to capture Berlin.
Two days after the article appeared, a search of Google-news provided several suggested links to other stories on the same topic, but they were for sources outside the United States.
Fact checking the details of this allegation while many miles away from the familiar surroundings of the Santa Monica Public Library is very difficult and so this columnist can only ask why isn’t this story appearing in publications and on web sites operating inside the United States?
Doesn’t the United States brag about freedom of the press and freedom of speech?
Why then isn’t this story being reported by the Huffington Post and/or the New York Times so that a Google-news search can prove that it isn’t up to a bloging columnist in Australia to bring this newsworthy new book to the attention of an American web site’s audience?
Could it be that the managing editors of the most influential newspapers have suffered a plague of simultaneous misjudgment or what?
It should be obvious to most of this site’s regular readers why the conservative talk show hosts would ignore this interesting bit of history, but why aren’t the newspapers trying extra hard to be vigilant after their disgraceful performance during the Bush years?
The conservative talk show hosts always maintain that the lunatic left journalists in the United States never miss a chance to make America look bad.  If Bill O’Reilly’s assessment of American Journalism was accurate, wouldn’t the New York Times and the Washington Post be all over this new book and putting reviews on the front pages?
A blogger traveling in Australia can cover anything that catches his fancy.  He could choose to cover the automotive event called the Summer Nats  (http://www.summernats.com.au/) and his friends back in the States would know he was having a good time.  It’s doubtful that this car event will get coverage in the USA and there will be no outrage, but is it OK for American media to drop the ball on the possibility that the U. S. may have changed history by hushing up a dissatisfied American general?
Readers of this column can urge American sources to investigate the possibility of a cover-up back in 1945 and they may or may not inspire some action and reaction in the media. 
Bill O’Reilly will continue to criticize the New York Times and the stories it runs, but it seems very unlikely that he will plug this column and this website.
Do Americans who lost relatives in the late stages of WWII care about things like the possibility that General Patton may have been prevented from closing the Falaise Gap?
All a columnist in Fremantle can do is bring up the topic and then perhaps go to South Beach to work on getting a better suntan.  (Does Jalopnik want photo coverage of an event in Australia?) 
The Western Australian quotes Charles Province, president of the George Paton Historical Society as saying “There were a lot of people who were pretty damn glad that Patton died.”
Now the disk jockey will play what the Aussies call “a Northern Hemisphere” song:  Bing Crosby’s “White Christmas” (no this is not the signal to evacuate Saigon) and we’ll hang up our Christmas Stocking and hope that Santa brings us a chance to scoop the New York Times.  Have a “Merry Christmas!” type week.

December 22, 2008

Why We Shouldn’t Be in Afghanistan

Filed under: Uncategorized — alex @ 1:56 pm

We’ve now passed the grim milestone of over 100 Canadians killed in Afghanistan.
In light of that, I want to repost this clip from my podcast, detailing why the war in
Afghanistan is unwinnable, and why we need to bring the troops home.

Mission Impossible : The Afghan War – MP3 file 2.8M

Podcast Page

An excellent answer to our energy problems – Grimgold

Filed under: Uncategorized — grimgold @ 1:56 pm

First there’s this:

Armed with survey results revealing public misperceptions about energy use, The Pink Panther(TM), Chief Energy Officer at Owens Corning (NYSE: OC), broke his decades of silence on October 9, 2008 to focus national attention on the massive amount of energy used to heat and cool buildings. According to the U.S. Department of Energy (DOE), 40 percent of U.S. energy is swallowed by buildings, yet most Americans believe transportation and industry are the largest offenders.

To View the Multimedia News Release, go to:

http://www.prnewswire.com/mnr/owenscorning/35579/

Then there’s this:

The earth absorbs almost 50% of all solar energy and remains a nearly constant temperature of 50°F to 70°F depending on geographic location. Working with an underground loop system, a Climate Master geothermal unit utilizes this constant temperature to exchange energy between your home and the earth as needed for heating and cooling.

In winter, water circulating inside a sealed loop absorbs heat from the earth and carries it to the unit. Here it is compressed to a higher temperature and sent as warm air to your indoor system for distribution throughout your home.

In the summer, the system reverses and expels heat from your home to the cooler earth via the loop system. This heat exchange process is not only natural, but is a truly ingenious and highly efficient way to create a comfortable climate in your home.

I’m not sure pumping water into the ground to cool a building is the best way; air might do the job just as well and be a lot less problematic. But you get the idea – geothermal systems are an excellent way to reduce America’s energy consumption, yet are being largely ignored.
Grimmy

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