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November 2, 2012

Ye Olde Scribe Presents: October Suuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrprise!

Filed under: Commentary — Ye Olde Scribe @ 8:10 am

jimn
(Apologies to Jim, not a horse, NEIGHbors)

YOS is also upset at the October surprise: Sandy. How DARE the Obama administration conspire with outside forces to steal an election, especially an “outside force” who is supposed to be on OUR side, oh, fellow Teabag religiously whacked far Rightward wingnuts?

Doesn’t the Almighty know who he’s helping? Hey JESUS! Didn’t you notice? He’s a NIG… He’s, uh, BLACK! Damn, damn, DAMN. Now we have to work harder to steal the vote, refuse the vote to anyone but the chosen: right wing, religiously conservative, evolution-global climate change hating, true “Amur-ICK-cans.”

Time to take out the theological, divine, trash.

Let’s gather at our churches and protest! Come wearing teabags, American flag underwear: and nothing else, hats with pink crosses on top of them, or dressed as George Washington in drag. You know: just a little more sedate than usual? It’s a church, after all. We must be humble before the Lord, even though he’s turned out to be a Socialist, godCommie, fag, queer loving, Kenyan enabling, buddy to terrorists,worse than Osama who is still alive and living under the White House where the head NIG… uh, “Boy,” ah, “resident,” brings bin Laden lobster and steak made from aborted baby brains every day.

And, if like an abortion doctor, someone shoots Jesus during the process, we had NOTHING to do with it. Even though it would be Jesus’ own fault for helping that %$#@!$%#@!* who is in OUR White House. Again, it’s known as the WHITE House. Don’t you know that

This message approved by Teabaggers United, which does NOT approve of actual teabagging, though in the dark, just thinking of it, DOES makes them HOT.

By the way, dear readers…

buddy-jesus

YES, that was SATIRE.

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