October 18, 2015

Let your Freak Flag Fly, ‘scuse me while I kiss the sky

Filed under: Uncategorized — Bob Patterson @ 2:11 pm


By Belle Starr, Outlawyer, as told to Bob Patterson

The Prankster Pundits
As the former official counsel (attorney) for OccupySF and as a few years have now passed it seemed time to expand our repertoire into the field of punditry.

Disclaimer: The Outlawyer has committed the most grievous crime of being contra stereotypical and refusing fame for being one of the first transsexuals in the world since 1974 (even being on television with the iconic Christine Jorgensen) but not capitalizing on it.

This has flummoxed the San Francisco counter-culture into the continuing hate crime of prior censorship and denial of Belle’s write-in candidacy this year for Mayor of SF and her pivotal role in the formation and continuation of Occupy San Francisco. This is a hate crime under today’s standards since we are all supposed to be equal, loving and accepting…but aren’t.

The Dark Age of Fear
Presenting Nightside-After Dark America and the lurkers in the shadows. Is it true that vampires are now real? Only an in depth search for America can answer this and other burning questions. Only a modest nighttime ghost can successfully penetrate the shadows and answer the questions of paranormal, alienage or what makes humans so dumb as to be fooled into war after war. Bring garlic and cannabis as you follow the antics of a hippie trying to sell out or sell something since there is no pension for under the table cafes and speakeasies.

Decade of Fear – what is most important and where to start? That is the fear expressed by a nice young man in his twenties which rather shocked me. Fear in a twenty something? Frozen by too many things needing to be done that he doesn’t know where to start? or what to actually do-panic, protest or get a job or stoned?

Ponderosa Pine ( hippie who laid down his life for the redwoods and won by stopping the lumber trucks…try that now and “roadkill” probably) said I was coming of age in a time of peak confidence. Now I am oldish and being told of fear in the youth. Have to reverse this trend. Remember the Fearless Seventies after the Psychedelic Sixties? Fear no more.

Blazing Saddles: Has political correctness crossed back into the dreaded category of ultra hipness? When the jewish indian (Mel Brooks) won’t kill the settlor it is quite racist but we all laughed. The sheriff was racist and made fun of himself and Gov. Pettibone was a horney rascal. What happened to humor? We can’t even make fun of our foibles any longer. Watch it and you will know what I mean- even to Lily von Schtuck’s comments about the sheriff. Dj cue up De camp town ladies and I get no kick from champagne….

Carlos Hathcock (White Feather) took down a Vietnamese General at two miles. Politically incorrect awesomeness.

Co-operate with your own Karma
PTSD from Bed Bugs? I have real fear of being attacked at any time by bedbugs. A new diagnosis of hyper alert for PTSD Cilex mania. They attack at night when this sentry slumps into fitful sleep awakening to the terror of days of periodic intense itches and mountainous bite bumps. Horrible to contemplate. Add to that legislation passed but not yet working or affective so that these enemy bug troops (starship troopers report) keep infesting as mattresses are left for people to take home rather than burned.

If you are in subsidized housing (Slang:SRO for single room occupancy) you get to pay for disposal or, as with all the poverty challenged, simply put outdoors when no one is looking. Public health is losing, legislation is like hitting a tar baby and implementation is according to the tortoise not the hare.



This is a picture of the Xtracycle. The Suburban Mom’s mini-van. It was cool to talk to a young mother who said she could take it on the bus and put the children in when riding on the bike and no parking problems. It was her min-van she said.

I have it on good authority that this Outlawyer is Too different (beyond the border). I dispute that. I am just avant guard and point out that in California one can demand to die but cannot get experimental drugs if they are terminal. Where is MY right to life legislation? I want the best medicine not just The Gong Show. (WLJ—Belle is the point-person in a heroic effort to revive automatic writing as l’nouveau perre UBU roi – Goggle It).

How to tell the truth or which lie should I tell- guided by voices: Am I the new Unrealist? (Hi Mr. Krassner, nice to meet you, can I use this spoof on the realist? hahah i just did). The voices in rock and roll songs, I was told by a coma returnee, have all the secrets but I have trouble deciphering lyrics. If they have a beat and I can finger pop to them, that’s all I need.

After rescuing the laziest pundit (no old folks home for me…catch me if you can) isn’t it Time for elder breakout rescue teams to liberate those trapped in bored and careless homes? (WLJ— Belle during the Summer of the great NY prison break wonders if there is a market for selling the services of an extraction team to inmates of the old folks home of the bored and careless kind. Some of the wretched trapped elderly would probably sign over all their worldly goods for hope of escape. If a supper of peanut butter and jelly sandwich with rice soup sounds acceptable to the reader we are willing to wager you couldn’t maintain that existence for a week and keep your sanity(“dear God, I’ll do anything you want if you only get me out of here)).

We, at least, could periodically invade with smiles and happiness to cheer up those stuck there. Do we always need to be paid for kindness? NO, and we are going to prove this point with The Last Love-in.

How many members f the Dave Clark 5 can you name?

Cue up a more politically incorrect “Hair” (Listen to the whole album ), Break on Through (to the other side ) by the doors and out with The Who “Magic Bus” and “My Gen Gen Generation”.

Have a revelation and write in your votes. Jobs for counters and legitimize your ballots.
Power to the People!
If elected a lava lamp in every window.

Contact: you can’t get there from here but I can write directions that will get you to the ragged edge. Inquiries invited – do not expect a reply.


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