Tony Hendra, The Huffington Post, June 30, 2007
There was a party atmosphere at the end of the Supreme Court’s session yesterday. A jubilant rightwing majority, represented by Justice Alito, made three dramatic announcements concerning the future makeup and direction of the court:
A. Effective immediately the Supreme Court will be renamed the Supremacist Court of the United States. The vote to rename was 5-4.
B. The first obligation of the Supremacist Court declared Justice Alito was resegregation. A colorblind Court should never elevate jurists to its bench simply by reason of their color. Since Justice Thomas had undeniably been nominated by George Bush Sr. because of his race: A. to fill the seat vacated by Thurgood Marshall and B. to dare the Democrats to reject him after their rejection of Robert Bork, he should be removed forthwith from the bench.
Justice Thomas fully concurred citing ‘extensive and incontrovertible evidence’ that the Framers’ ‘original intent’ had been an all-white all-male Court. “The idea that a black man can sit on this bench purely by virtue of his race is beyond outrageous – it is laughable. Imagine the Framers’ condoning such an absurdity…” He went on to entertain the court with an impersonation of an 18th century African-American “perhaps one of my own slave ancestors from Georgia” sitting beside Chief Justice John Jay at the Court’s opening session in 1790.