BartBlog

January 24, 2010

Ye Old Scribe Presents: “Yes, Virginia, Corporations ARE People Too”

Filed under: Commentary — Ye Olde Scribe @ 7:47 pm

“Because all ‘people’ with rights also have responsibilities.”

Damn Pinko Socialist Commie Liberals. Don’t they know, Virginia, that corporations are people too? And like humans they have responsibilities, or they’re SUPPOSED TO. If that’s so, then Scribe is “A-OK” with corporate person-hood.

Now we have a conundrum, a quandry, a problem. Do we execute only the brain or all the cells of that “person?” If Halliburton is found to have helped terrorists, or harmed the troops, do we waterboard the CEO or every employee? Blackwater supplies our enemies with talking points? Off to Gitmo they go. And, by the way, since Junior’s Crime Syndicate gave the Taliban millions of dollars just before 9/11 that Scribe figures went right into the pockets of the plotters, should we have Junior and his sleazy, plastic wifey watch while soldiers rape the two Bush sluts, just like some prisoners had to watch their kids raped? Maybe hook up some live wires and make Laura stand in a pool of water? Piss on their Bibles: use the pages as toilet paper?

Well, if corporations are people, then all their employees should be available to be snatched off the streets, or out of an airport because that’s “international ground,” not national, and turned into vegetables, just like Jose’ Padilla.

If corporations and crime families are people with free speech rights: more rights then everyone else since they have a hell of a lot more money, then they have a lot more responsibilities, right?

Oh, boy. Scribe CAN’T WAIT!

Can he help pour the water or pull the switch?

Just call if you need him.

He’ll be waiting.

2 Comments

  1. Mark Crispin Miller had a good idea — have a corproation try to register to vote — if you can’t find one that will, start one — and watch the registration be rejected. Use this as a basis to challenege the Roberts’ court horrible ruling that gives corporations the right of free speech available to ‘we the people.’

    Either the Supremes will strike down the law, or give corporations the right to vote, which would be hard since there is no ‘corpus’ to register or vote. But if corpos are given the right to vote somehow, the blowback from the public would be torrential. It would show how ridiculous this ruling really is.

    Comment by RS Janes — January 25, 2010 @ 6:00 pm

  2. Trying to ruin Scribe’s fun, huh? Now what’s he going to do with all those “bend over” probes he bought, like they used on the detainees?

    Comment by Ye Olde Scribe — January 25, 2010 @ 9:38 pm

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