February 23, 2009

The Tattlesnake – And the Award Goes to… Edition

Filed under: Commentary,Opinion — Tags: , , , , , — RS Janes @ 5:46 pm

Of course, I’m talking about the 29th Annual Razzie Awards for the worst films and actors of 2008. The winners are:

Worst Picture: Mike Myers’ monumental movie mistake “The Love Guru,” although I think the also-nominated “The Hottie and the Nottie” should have nabbed a Dishonorable Mention.

Worst Actor: ‘Winner’ Mike Myers (“The Love Guru”) beat out Larry the Cable Guy? Of course, Mr. ‘Cable Guy’ has never claimed to be an actor, so perhaps this is fair after all. Is Myers trying to get out of a contract, or does he just not care anymore with tripe like this?

Worst Actress: The true Slumdog Millionaire (with a publicist) Paris Hilton for her performance in “The Hottie and the Nottie.” The AP reports that Paris’ two films, the aforementioned bomb and “Repo: The Genetic Opera,” combined did not take in $200 thousand at the box office, giving the lie to the alleged public popularity of the celebutard hotel heiress. Like the fully useless Donald Trump, Hilton’s celebrity is based solely on her ability to hire a good ‘sweet smell of success’ (or, in this case ‘stink’) PR agent who will endlessly get her name mentioned in the media. Isn’t it time for Paris to join fellow stick-figure clotheshorse Cindy Crawford (“Fair Game,” one of the worst movies ever made) in the land of sunny dumb obscurity?


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