BartBlog

Now that Mothers Day is almost upon us, I’ve been thinking a lot about the fine art of giving birth — and now have reached one seminal conclusion based on both experience and scientific research. “There is no way that it’s not gonna hurt.” Take myself for example.

Baby # 1: I was so totally naive before going into labor. Was at a late-night party in Greenwich Village (and unsuccessfully trying to chat with Bob Dylan) when my stomach suddenly started getting really bad menstrual cramps. Huh? I’m nine months pregnant. I’m not spozed to be having cramps! So I street-hiked off to the Women’s’ Infirmary, suffered through two hours of intense labor, fought off major attempts to give me anesthetics, screamed a lot and then gave birth to a girl.

Baby # 2: Moved back to California, got pregnant again, went into labor, finally recognized the symptoms, couldn’t find a ride to the hospital and ended up persuading my speed-freak neighbors to give me a lift. Why not. They were gonna be up all night anyway. Once at the hospital, I started screaming and hollering once again. The nurses told me to shut up. They were old-school. Two hours later, out popped another baby girl.

Baby # 3: While suffering from stage-nine pregnancy and looking as big as a house, I moved all my stuff into a new apartment in Berkeley, finished unpacking the last box, gave a deep sigh of relief — and went into labor. “Another girl?” I asked. When they told me it wasn’t, this unexpected announcement surprised me so much that I actually asked the nurse, “If it’s not a girl, then what could it be?”

“It’s a boy!” she replied. Who knew.

Baby #4: I was finally beginning to realize where babies come from — but too late. “You need a C-section,” stated the doctor. Over my dead body! “That can be arranged.” But I somehow managed to fight off the obstetrical team (literally) and three hours later yet another baby girl popped out — butt first.

And as my children grew up, I tried my very hardest to be a good mother. I really did. I honestly did. Must have done something right. I guess. Years later, all four of my adult children are alive and doing well. But how do other women manage to be so good at motherhood and take to it like a duck to water instead of almost drowning? Hats off to you. I salute you on Mothers Day. Good job!

And I have also discovered another way that childbirth can really hurt. As the British phrase it, I’d given birth to “One heir and three spares” — thinking that surely at least one of the four will come visit me when I finally get carted off to the rest home? But this is never to be. Just as I’m starting to get old, boring, needy and poor, they’ve all thought up some cheesy reason or other to bail. All that childbirth pain for nothing! Rats. Not even any Mothers Day cards for me. I warned you. I told you that childbirth hurt.

But still and all, I’m definitely not the worst mother in the world. I never gave birth to or raised any babies that grew up to be monsters. None of my kids have blown up the World Trade Center, covered up the plot to murder JFK or were personally responsible for the slaughter of over a million human beings in the Middle East! At least I’m not Barbara Bush.

PS: Will be spending Mothers Day in Long Beach of all places. Am going there to attend the Al Awda conference on Palestine http://al-awda.org/conference13/

What is happening in Gaza right now is totally painful too. And insanely criminal as well. In the past four weeks, Israeli snipers using high-powered rifles have deliberately succeeded in knee-capping and/or maiming approximately 7,000 non-violent Palestinian protesters. That’s just gotta hurt. If anyone needs some five-star mothering right now, it’s those poor wretched Palestinian rebels. Mothers Day in Gaza is gonna be painful for sure. Oy vey! https://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2018/05/horror-movie-in-gaza-theyre-eating-our.html

Americans really do love to watch classic old horror movies. Perhaps that is why they continue to let all those grim slaughters in the Middle East go on for so long.

For instance, it’s just like watching “Silence of the Lambs” in Gaza right now — where 100 highly-trained and sadistic Israeli snipers are happily picking off nonviolent protesters there one by one. Hannibal Lector himself couldn’t be doing a better job.

Syria has become yet another horror-movie classic — one where no one suspects those innocent-looking Americans of being the creepy guys supplying ISIS with chain saws. That great scene where a massive invasion of evil ISIS villains crosses the desert in Toyotas? No way that Americans could have avoided spotting all that spooky road dust on their Google satellite apps. “They’re coming! Hide in the basement!” Bad idea.

Afghanistan? Who first gave those Taliban wannabe-Freddy Kruegers their claw hands in the first place? It was America. “Charlie Wilson’s War” is the ultimate horror flick.

Yemen? Thanks to America and Saudi Arabia working together like the BFF zombies they are, Yemen is starting to look exactly like where they filmed that final scene in “Night of the Living Dead”. The monsters just keep on coming and coming and coming.

And how about that unarmed and vulnerable teenager Libya? Why the freak did Qaddafi stay alone in that cabin in the woods overnight when he knew that blood-sucking NATO was on the prowl? And now Iran is about to make that same mistake. Run for your life, Iran! America has a bloody hatchet — and knows how to use it too.

The only trouble with this classic-horror-film analogy is that, while Freddy and Hannibal are fun to watch on TV late at night, American hatchet murders and chain-saw-like dismemberments are real — and Americans have become experts on how to create millions of extremely life-like corpses. Or at least ones that used to be alive.

“Odor in the court! The judge is eating beans!” But something else also stinks about the American justice system — mainly that, for many of us, there is very little justice here. True justice is only achieved when laws are applied equally to all Americans. It is only after judicial equality is achieved that we can claim to be a civilized nation living under the all-important Rule of Law. Otherwise our courts are just merely farting around.

And this very same definition of justice also applies on an international level as well.

Since World War II, America has been given free reign to commit the most atrocious war crimes since Stalin, Hitler and Genghis Khan — and yet no international court of law has even attempted to stop the USA from committing these war crimes or even to slap its hand or give it a time-out. Murdering thousands of Christians at Sunday prayer at a church in Nagasaki, spreading Agent Orange all over Vietnam and carpet-bombing Cambodia? Not to mention the horrors of “wars” and proxy “wars” in Iraq, Libya, Syria, Palestine, Afghanistan, Honduras, Ukraine, Haiti, Yemen, etc. that violate almost every Geneva Convention there is. War-Crimes R Us. https://consortiumnews.com/2014/08/09/the-very-un-christian-nagasaki-bomb/

“He gassed his own people,” Americans were constantly told regarding Saddam Hussein. Huh? Saddam hardly didn’t even eat beans. And yet America has been gassing its own people since 1776 — from Wounded Knee and the New Orleans slave markets to Selma, Waco, Baltimore and beyond. That’s hypocrisy. That’s hubris. That’s cutting the cheese. But let’s move on.

Suppose Saddam Hussein had been brought before The Hague for judgment instead of Americans just assuming he was guilty enough to justify the slaughter a million Iraqis? Just think of the five or ten trillion $$$ we would have saved. https://www.icc-cpi.int/pages/situations.aspx

And then there’s Israel, the Saudis and the FUK-US coalition (France the United Kingdom and the US) who are still enthusiastically committing war crimes in the Middle East every single day — even as we speak. If only the world would put them on trial at The Hague instead of letting them murder and slaughter like Jack the Ripper on a rampage, then just think of all the money we would save there too. To paraphrase John Donne, “Send not to know for whom the gas was passed. It was FUK-US.” http://21stcenturywire.com/2018/05/02/in-honour-of-the-syrian-arab-army-and-allies-war-on-terror/

And think of this also — if all these American super-villain war criminals and their allies were caught and jailed, then we wouldn’t need to be scared in our beds every night, terrified that the world is a terrifying place. Why? Because it wouldn’t be. The bad guys would all be in jail.

Plus we could easily put all of our kids through college with the trillions of dollars we will have saved. Just think of The Hague as one gigantic 401-K.

We could also sleep better at night knowing that our country was not out there in Libya, Ukraine, Iraq, Syria, Haiti, Yemen, Gaza, etc. committing war crimes and venting jockey-bombs in our name.

You get the idea, right?

Now go do something about it.

My go-phone just died. “Maybe you forgot to charge it?” asked a friend. No. I just forgot to pay my freaking phone bill at the first of the month.

If you don’t pay your bills, you get cut off. Everyone knows that. It’s the law. Literally. And this law not only just applies to ordinary people like you and me, it also applies to our government as well. Duh.

And the first of the month is once again starting to roll around for you and for me — and also for the United States of America too.

Who is going to foot the bill for all those thousands of ICE raids that we hear so much about on TV?

Who is going to write out that big check for America’s half-baked and squalid “war on terror” and all those other phony, invented (and totally pricey) other “wars” that Washington delights in? http://thesaker.is/saker-book-review-pokemon-in-ukraine-tactical-war-game-introduction-manual/

Who will keep the lights on in our expensive and elaborate prison system?

Who is going to have to tighten their belts in order to pay for the Border Wall? https://www.unz.com/article/the-border-fetish/

Who will have to bite the bullet financially in order to pay for the Afghanistan fiasco? Israel’s sick apartheid regime? All those cute (and very expensive) little acronyms for oppressive operations abroad such as the CIA, AFRICOM, NATO, FUK-US, SOUTHCOM, PACOM, US-AID and SOCOM? And also for all those cute (and very expensive) little acronyms for oppressive operations here at home such as the NSA, SWAT, DEA, DHS, SEC, ATF and FDA? https://nsarchive2.gwu.edu/NSAEBB/NSAEBB216/app1.pdf

Who will be stuck with trying to pay all these bills when the first of the month finally rolls around for the USA as well as for us? It will be you and me that will be stuck with trying to fend off the repo man after America goes bankrupt. https://patch.com/california/lajolla/californias-largest-employer

America is not spending its money wisely. And who the hell do you think is going to get stiffed for the tab?

During World War II, Americans all voluntarily tightened their belts in order to pay for what they thought was a good use of their money — but in America today most of us are involuntarily tightening our belts. But why? So that the the rich can get richer of course. Yet all we get out of it is to lose our homes, lose our futures and get even more stinking “wars” shoved down our throats.

PS: A border Wall and an ICE machine have only proved to be wasteful and stop-gap solutions to a very real problem. It’s time to do the math correctly for a change. Immigrants come up here from Latin America because their lives down there have been made a living hell. So. If you don’t want them to come here, stop screwing up their lives down there. Boom. End of problem. They’d probably rather stay down there anyway, given a choice.

PPS: While recently re-reading my (most excellent) book recounting my experiences as an embedded journalist during the “war” on Iraq, I was (sort of) surprised to see Mike Pence’s name jump out on the page. Back in 2007, he and John McCain held a press conference in the Green Zone that I had attended, wherein Pence happily offered us poor benighted reporters an inside glimpse on how to be a truly shady war hawk. http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2007/04/letters-from-iraq-me-light-brigade-john.html

Who knew back in 2007 that this war-drum-pounding little piece of shite would someday become America’s vice-president and even help us spend approximately ten billion dollars in just one night on the illegal and criminal bombing of Syria. Guess Pence just couldn’t get enough of Shock and Awe — and was willing to tell the exact same lies to see it all happen again.

Still and all, ten billion dollars woulda gone a hecka long way toward paying off my go-phone bill.

That’s my pop, off to war

I’m only human. I watch the videos currently coming out of Gaza and I am horrified and shocked. I see footage of Israeli neo-colonialist bullies and thugs, armed to the teeth, dressed in riot gear, backed up by missiles and tanks, holding the absolute latest long-range sniper weaponry in their hands and firing gleefully on unarmed Palestinians whose only crime is to be born into an Israeli concentration camp — and not just shut up and die quietly of mal-nourishment and disease.

These Israeli snipers appear to be deliberately aiming at Palestinians’ elbows and knees. They know that there are very few doctors, hospitals and blood banks left in Gaza. They know that they have just crippled over 4000 Gazans for life. They plan it that way. Creating instant piles of Palestinian corpses just isn’t as much fun.

And yet these same brutal Israeli neo-con villains then have the audacity to tell us that they are committing these vile atrocities in the name of the six million Jews who were murdered by Nazi thugs.

Every time I tour yet another Jewish holocaust museum or see yet another movie about the Jewish holocaust or watch yet another documentary about the Jewish holocaust on TV, I shudder over the sheer hypocrisy of Israeli neo-cons — and I’m willing to bet that if there is an afterlife somewhere, the troubled souls of six million Jews there are shuddering too.

Shame on you, Israel.

_____________________________

Stop Wall Street and War Street from destroying our world. And while you’re at it, please buy my books. https://www.amazon.com/Jane-Stillwater/e/B00IW6O1RM

Ever since before TV was even invented, there’s been a really huge reality show being broadcast here in America. It’s called “The Deep State Show”. And yet despite its consistent rating as the longest-running reality show ever and even despite its presence in every single aspect of our lives, the average American has hardly even heard of it and never even gets to watch it either. Nobody here ever asks their friends the next day, “Hey, did you see the latest episode of ‘The Deep State Show’ last night?” In fact, nobody in America has hardly even heard of the Deep State Show before — until now.

Why now?

Because, although the Deep State has been successfully eating its young in other parts of the world for the past century or so, it appears there are almost no more young in the rest of the world left to eat and so now it has started to eat ours too.

“You need to define your terms, Jane,” you might say. Why? Defining one’s terms is boring. But okay. I’ll give it a shot. It’s the freaking military-industrial complex. It’s Wall Street and War Street. It’s those dudes in three-piece suits that plot ways to steal the resources out of all the other countries on earth — and now that the rest of the world has been pretty much sucked dry, they have come after America’s resources too.

It’s the guys who live in penthouses and drive Ferraris yet get their knickers all in a twist when the rest of us Americans even dare to drive a used Hyundai or buy a fixer-upper out in the sticks. It’s those greedy welfare capitalists who won’t let the rest of us have a safety net too. That’s who it is. Capisce? https://www.politicalorphans.com/the-article-removed-from-forbes-why-white-evangelicalism-is-so-cruel/

Let’s move on.

In our desperation these days, we more savvy Americans are actually starting to question the Deep State. And so the Deep State Show throws us a scapegoat, a bone. All fingers now point to Donald Trump instead of to the actual men behind the curtain. Duh.

All this talk about building a border Wall and about uppity Black people is just to get us to hate each other instead of hating the worst reality show ev-ah. And yet what is at stake here is our own reality as well as the Deep State’s. It is our young that are now getting eaten.

Well, now that I’ve got all that off my chest, what happens next? I wanna go down to Guadalajara. “How’s that going to help?” you might ask next. Because thousands of people from Central America and Mexico, the ones who have already had their young eaten by The Deep State Show decades ago, are now trying to come to America and show us, “This is what it looks like to have your hopes and treasures destroyed. This is what you too will look like in another couple of years, after the Deep State has had its way with you too.” https://www.buzzfeed.com/adolfoflores/caravan-mexico-honduras-trump-immigration?utm_term=.duRR7kLxVP#.plAkDlpnW8

So. Hundreds of people have been marching through Mexico in the last month. They have gotten as far as Guadalajara and are now on their way to Tijuana, carrying banners that read stuff like,” We want our lives back!”. And I want to join them. Why? Because I don’t want my young to be eaten by no greedy old dudes on a reality show either. And neither should you!

PS: If anyone actually knows anything about how I can actually get to Guadalajara and join the march, please let me know. And please don’t tell me to ask Donald Trump — or the Deep State Show either.

Just got an e-mail from a friend of mine in Aleppo regarding the recent “Friday the 13th” missile strike there — brought to the Syrian people courtesy of FUK-US (France, the United Kingdom and the U.S.) My friend watched the event on Syrian TV and apparently it was like watching a low-budget horror movie — not all that scary. 70% of the missiles were shot down by Syrian equipment left over from the 1960s. So much for Fire and Fury.

“Yes, it was was a very long day here,” wrote my friend, “and I watched Trump’s ‘made-for TV movie’ from beginning to end. I woke up around 3:50 am and switched on the television in time to see the terrorist Trump, live, giving his signal for the attack.” And my friend then stayed awake until 11:30 pm the next evening, not wanting to miss any part of the show.

“So I kept following the news and by the second night there were around six or seven variations and narratives of what had happened. Gossip and rumors were everywhere here.” I can just imagine.

“The final and most corrected version so far, however, coming from several media sources and on the ground here, is that most of the NATO missiles had been downed by the Syrian defense system, and that damage was limited to one (1) building (a research center) being destroyed and three soldiers injured. The other targeted buildings had already been targeted from last year or even previously blown up by terrorists and were already destroyed partly or completely, or were abandoned, so targeting them wasn’t a heroic job by the FUK-US alliance.”

Rumor in Syria also has it that “Everyone from our side (Syria, Iran and Russia) already knew the targets in advance (conspiracy 😎), or that they were all ready for it and well-prepared to face it. Downing 70%-80% of the missiles was an amazing job! People were celebrating in the streets around midday in the cities (Damas-Aleppo-Tartous-Latakya…etc).”

Since America’s 2011 illegal and criminal invasion-by-proxy, Syrians have been forced to develop a sense of humor in order to cope with the horror of having hundreds of thousands of Syrians blown to bits by FUK-US and its proxy mercenary/terrorist boots on the ground. “We were all forwarding jokes both before and after the strike regarding Trump and the strike. I mean no one was really afraid. That is a big difference between now and the first years of the crisis where everyone was [pooping] in their pants, and when such a threat took place by Obama in August of 2013. We finally are having a good survival experience now after seven years of this filthy war.”

And then there’s the economic downside of the US criminal invasion of Syria. “The dollar price of goods was getting lower a week or two ago as Syria made great gains in evicting the terrorist invaders, but then prices started bouncing up and down after the Trump threats and delaying of the strike. Some merchants took advantage of that to take more money from the people’s pockets when goods’ prices got slightly more expensive. But everything will go down now that monsieur Trump accomplished his mission!”

And here’s some more news we can use. “The Saudis paid for the strike, and so the FUK-US obviously felt that they had to deliver the service. This means that those mighty armies of those three great nations have become just grubby mercenaries today, ready to attack anyone if you have the cash! Everything is for sale! Even dignity and honor.”

Trust me, my friend in Aleppo is truly pissed off.

“We are also just learning now that among the missile targets were some already-abandoned buildings that had already been targeted previously last year. It means that they targeted rubble over and over again! This means that FUK-US is out of targets so they are targeting the same targets over and over again. If so, the Saudis paid a whole lot of money to have those missiles dumped on rubble and abandoned buildings. Good investment!” Or not.

“Trump, the one-man show, wanted to make a huge propaganda move with those missiles and to play the role of a great leader who accomplished his mission! But he’s only a joker in the eyes of many. For the sake of the western media, the three attackers stated that they did what they had to do for ethical reasons. Of course they did so!!! No kidding!! 👏🏻 Bravo!! I’m having tears in my eyes right now….. 😂 laughing tears, I mean! That joker is making me laugh.”

And then my friend in Aleppo pretty much nails how the rest of the world sees America now. “Those criminals know nothing about ethics and morals and they don’t care about millions of dead people, including children and women all over the world (even as they always show themselves as the #1 in humanitarianism). All that they are interested in is their pocket money 💰, oil, ⛽️ gas, greed, the protection of Israel and the lust of power. They are ready to do whatever it needs to reach their goals.”

Then my friend regaled me with some of the more interesting gossip floating around Aleppo right now, including the following: “Some are saying that ‘there is a conspiracy between all players together. It’s all a set-up! Everyone is dealing with the other under the table.’ I have no comment on that one.”

Next rumor: “That ‘the Syrian Defense didn’t down any rocket or missile, that was fake news, and the damage is so big that hundreds lost their lives!’ No comment on that one either.”

And regarding chemical weapons, “Gossips are saying that there was ‘a deal to collect all chemical weapons somewhere in the desert, to be targeted all together by the 103 missiles!’ However, if there actually were any chemical weapons in Syria and they had been hit, their damage would have been spread to the whole region. Plus it’s obvious that Syria doesn’t have that type of weapon anymore, and that the White Helmets’ screenplay featuring crisis actors was pathetic, fake and staged — so I’m not buying that silly analysis.”

Here’s another rumor: “Some are saying that they targeted Aleppo and Damascus military airports. But I heard nothing that day in Aleppo (yes, it’s far away, but on calm nights you can hear gun clashes from miles away, let alone Tomahawk missiles hitting a military airport). And the Damascus airport is still working and didn’t stop, both the military and civilian ones.”

My friend continues to have other questions too. “People in Aleppo are also asking themselves, ‘How come all these multi-million-dollar FUK-US rockets and missiles injured only three soldiers — while in the past, before Aleppo was liberated by Syrian troops, just one random shelling by terrorists using only a hand-made cooking-gas container used to kill and injure dozens of people?’ Good question. Those were random shells targeting people in markets and crowded areas. However, while the FUK-US strike was well planned, the Syrian defensing was well-prepared to face it and all their missile targets were not occupied by civilians. I admit, a lot of arguments could go on this point back and forth. But time will reveal the truth.”

And my friend also sent me some of the latest jokes making the rounds in Aleppo. “People in Homs are gathering in the city center, begging Trump to re-strike Syria because they had been asleep that night and missed the first show!”

And of course a lot of Syrians are riffing off the timing of FUK-US’s missile strike. “It was Friday the 13th when Trump launched the strike. Does that mean he’s a witch?”

A popular meme going around on Syrian FaceBook (if there is such a thing) shows a Syrian soldier holding up one of his fingers with just a very slight pin-prick of blood on it. The caption reads, “Of the damage of the tripartite aggression on Damascus, the wounding of a Syrian soldier with Tomahawk missiles!”

Then there’s this one: “Trump promised to send new missiles to Syria — causing one reporter in Homs to ask, ‘If they weren’t brand new as promised, in their original packaging and with the plastic seals still intact, can we then reject them and send them back to Trump by UPS or FedEx?” 😂

In a bold move to curry favor with Jesus, President Donald Trump and his neo-con acolytes in the Deep State and military-industrial complex, like President Obama before them, have just made every effort to please Him by attempting to send hundreds — if not thousands — of His devoted Christian followers in Syria up to meet their Maker in Heaven. http://www.moonofalabama.org/2018/04/syria-manipulated-videos-fail-to-launch-world-war-iii.html

God is actually quite pleased to have all these Syrian Christian martyrs to keep him company in Heaven.

God, however, is definitely NOT pleased with Trump, Bolton, Pence and the American military-industrial complex. http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2014/04/engineering-chaos-mother-agnes-miriam.html

“Hell, I thought they were all Muslims,” Trump replied in his own defense. God was definitely not pleased with that answer either.

A truly terrible thing happened recently in Las Vegas when some locked-and-loaded, armed and dangerous psychotic homicidal sniper mercilessly fired 540 rounds of live ammunition a minute into a crowd of helpless and defenseless people in Vegas. https://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2017/10/02/us/vegas-guns.html

Within minutes after this heartless massacre by a crazed gunman happened, American media went crazy and provided us with 24-hour coverage of this horror — coverage that lasted for weeks. Sheldon Adelson, billionaire owner of the Bellagio casino, publicly deplored that something as horrendous as this could even happen and immediately started planning ways to help the survivors. Our entire nation was shocked and in mourning. https://www.timesofisrael.com/casino-mogul-adelson-met-with-trump-hours-after-las-vegas-shooting/

Now let’s compare this horrendous sniper attack in Vegas with the recent horrendous sniper attack by uber-locked-and-loaded, armed and dangerous Israeli neo-cons who mercilessly fired 540 live rounds of ammunition a second into a crowd of helpless and defenseless people in Gaza.

“What sniper attack in Gaza?” you might ask. “Never heard of it.” And yet even though 18 people were slaughtered and almost a thousand more were wounded by psychotic homicidal snipers firing into a helpless and defenseless crowd in Gaza, American mainstream media said almost nothing about it. http://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2018/04/a-good-friday-bloodbath-gazas-selma.html

And Sheldon Adelson not only made no public protest against this heinous and merciless act in Gaza, he totally applauded it — and probably even helped finance it as well.

I’ll never patronize the Bellagio again.

There is, however, one major difference between these two horrendous sniper attacks. On the one hand, I can always go off to Vegas at a moment’s notice — whereas, on the other hand, Gaza is the world’s largest concentration camp. No one goes in. No one goes out. Except in a body bag. Plus, of course, they don’t have any casinos in Gaza. Hell, thanks to Israeli neo-cons like Adelson and Bibi Netanyahu, trapped citizens of Gaza don’t even have electricity. They barely even have food.

Why is it that a vile sniper in Vegas who randomly fired on helpless and defenseless people is considered to be psychotic — while vile snipers who randomly fired on helpless and defenseless people in Gaza have now become national heroes in Israel and DC, and are supported by American taxpayers’ money to the tune of ten million dollars a day? What am I missing?

For one glorious summer back when I was young and (sort of) strong, I hitchhiked my way across Europe with only a pair of cowboy boots, a backpack, some Navy-surplus bell-bottom jeans, a red tank top and five tabs of LSD to keep me happy. Money meant nothing to me back then.

But now it does.

I just got back from speaking at a book convention in Reno, Nevada. The flight home was only 40 minutes long but even that was exhausting. The whole freaking trip was exhausting.

If only my bank account had been phat enough to allow me to stay at a quiet motel, eat healthy food and hire a porter to lug around my suitcase containing 47 pounds of free books, I would have been in much better shape when I got home.

Ah, home — where I know how to scrounge and can more easily find cheap ways to eat organic food and grass-fed meat because they are far healthier, give me an edge on the aging game and help me to live longer.

Home — where my adult children aren’t particularly fond of me right now, apparently because I am currently old, broke and a liability. Kicked to the curb on the flimsiest of pretexts. Can’t afford to dress to impress. Don’t have a high-paying job because I’m no longer young and (sort of) strong. Because they owed me money.

Home — where I can only afford a roof over my head because I’ve lived in the same apartment for the last 40 years and my rent is still low. And having a roof over one’s head becomes more and more crucial the older one gets.

Home — where thank goodness I have MediCare because if I didn’t, I’d be dead. And where I receive Social Security. For now. Seems to me like everybody wants to take away our Social Security and MediCare so that we baby boomers will die faster and stop clogging up the nursing homes. Everyone from Donald Trump to Fox News wants us out of the way. Might as well put a gun to our heads and get it over with — like they do in Parkland and the Middle East.

Home — where I can play grocery bingo at the senior center and hunt for bargains at the Berkeley Bowl and get all my fashion designs at Goodwill.

Money clearly does matter more to me now than it did way back when. Money keeps body and soul together these days. Money keeps me alive. Without it, I’d be dead a lot sooner than I would be if I was still young.

It’s just not like the old days at all, back when I wasn’t so fragile and could just live like Jack Kerouac — on the road.

PS: But even so, even at this age, I still have grandiose career ambitions and dreams. Sooner or later, someone in Hollywood is going to do a re-make of “What Ever Happened to Baby Jane” — and when they do, please please please cast me in the Bette Davis role! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3qFYjkFCxiE

I live in the San Francisco Bay Area, where the economy is definitely booming. But outside of the Bay Area? Not so much.

I’m currently in Reno at a book convention, trying to flog my latest detective novel — and I am also detecting something else here as well. From what I can tell after just a few days’ stakeout, many residents in the “Biggest Little City in the World” are clearly hurting for money and jobs — just like so many other folks in America today. https://www.amazon.com/Road-Trip-Damascus-Jane-Stillwater/dp/1548204730

But how can this be? How can the richest country in the world have fallen so low?

The answer is simple. “Judas in the White House” — or three of them, to be exact.

When all the votes were counted (or not) after the 2000 presidential election, American voters had given a clear mandate that we wanted to go in a people-friendly direction and away from all this nonsense about “war”. People voted for Gore. People voted for Nader. We shoulda gotten ecology and a fat peace dividend back in 2000. Instead we got George W. Bush shoved down our throats. And 9-11. And all its shabby results. Judas in the White House.

And then along came Obama. We voters gave him a clear mandate too — we wanted it our way, jobs and peace. Instead we got even more merciless slaughter in Iraq and Afghanistan shoved down our throats. Plus the horrors of additional “wars” and proxy wars in Libya, Syria, Yemen, Palestine and Ukraine too. Pathetic. http://www.syriasolidaritymovement.org/2018/03/27/ssm-statement-on-the-liberation-of-eastern-ghouta/

At the Reno convention this week, a handwriting analyst, Sheila Lowe, gave a very interesting talk. She said, “Obama’s handwriting shows that he was a great leader — but was under intense pressure to do things against his will”. But, all the same, he still did them anyway. Humph. Judas in the White House. http://www.claudiaroseseries.com/SheilaLoweBooks/books/

And then there’s Trump. “Make America great again,” he told his naive voters. And then he sold America out for 30 pieces of Wall Street and War Street. America now has more gun-toting Special Ops units in more countries worldwide than it has ambassadors. That’s just cray-cray. Not to mention Trump’s new BFFs, the slaughtering Saudis and infamous Israelis. Judas in the White House. https://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2018/04/a-good-friday-bloodbath-gazas-selma.html

It makes sense that Reno is hurting. It makes sense that America is hurting too. We’ve been sold out.

PS: Bush, Obama and Trump aren’t the only presidents who sold Americans out in order to keep the military-industrial complex happily lining their pockets with silver to the severe detriment for the rest of us. This has been an ongoing trend that only presidents Kennedy and Carter have even tried to buck.

President Wilson: Got us involved in grim European military-industrial battles that were none of our business.

President Roosevelt: World War II was allegedly fought to preserve democracy against fascism [Fascism defined as governments and corporations working together to screw the rest of us] but actually it was fought because Hitler and Tojo got too greedy and started horning in on America’s and Britain’s military-industrial complex swag.

President Truman: Proof is only just now surfacing that Korea was originally attacked by America because the Korean government was apparently becoming too nice to its own people and too representational — a very bad example to set. So Truman authorized dropping 1.5 million bombs on Korea, tearing the country apart and installing a cruel dictator in the south instead. https://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2008/09/my-trip-to-north-korea-pictures-worth.html

President Eisenhower: Allowed covert operations against Iran, Congo and various Central American countries because their leaders were becoming a bit too democratic and actually setting up unions, hospitals and schools. Clapped his hands in glee that a brutal dictator was our ally in Taiwan.

President Johnson: Had a good thing going with the Great Society but lied us into the “war” on Vietnam instead because Uncle Ho was becoming too democratic. Johnson also conspicuously looked the other way when Israeli neo-cons murdered 34 American sailors aboard the USS Liberty.

President Nixon: Lied to us in order to continue the “war” on Vietnam just because he could — and to help the US military-industrial complex continue to gut our treasury too.

Reagan: Mr. Judas himself. All it took was 30 pieces of silver to get him to murder thousands of Mayans, crucify Central America — and destroy the American economy as well. Trickle down? More like Trickle Up.

President Bush the First: Invented that phony Gulf “War” in order to steal Iraq’s oil for himself and his cronies. Hey, his plan worked. Nothing in it for the rest of us except Gulf War Syndrome however.

President Clinton: Chit-chatted a lot about our “peace dividend” but then went out of his way to destroy Yugoslavia and turn it into a hellhole. Why? Because Tito had been treating his people too kindly. Stuff like that just had to be stopped! And boy was it.

So. Here’s my one obvious question. “Have we Americans ever learned anything after all these decades of being betrayed again and again by our presidents in favor of warmongers and corporate carpetbaggers?” Apparently not.

My only hope is that Americans will now start to build on the current heroic Parkland protests and finally realize that the foul act of murdering any child anywhere is bad, bad and wrong — no matter how much profit for warmongers is involved.

“You must not lose faith in humanity,” said Mahatma Gandhi — and yet I have lost mine.

On Good Friday, 2018, hoards of Israeli snipers deliberately took aim at nonviolent protesters marching in Gaza — and then fired at will. https://www.facebook.com/walidmahmoudd/videos/1823164944423051/

It was a deliberate massacre, worse than Parkland, like shooting fish in a barrel, cold-blooded murder. 15 dead so far and a thousand wounded as the unarmed men, women and children of Gaza, the world’s largest concentration camp, vainly sought shelter.

It was like Martin Luther King’s rag-tag band of heroic protestors as they fought against the American South’s brutal, bloody and unjust caste system that we ourselves let go on so long. https://www.amazon.com/Warmth-Other-Suns-Americas-Migration/dp/0679763880

It was like the May 1943 Warsaw Ghetto uprising, like the pile of bodies in “Schindler’s List,” like the tragic little girl in the red coat.

It was like a Roman crucifixion on Good Friday or like Bloody Sunday in Derry. How can we ever have faith in humanity again?

Happy Easter.

More chocolate eggs, anyone?

How can any decent human being live with himself as, like at Parkland, like at Columbine, like at Guernica, like at Hiroshima, like in Syria, like in Yemen, like with Fire & Fury and Shock & Awe, we continue to brutally slaughter each other.

How come every single time that I go out of town, I somehow manage to find a place to stay that has the noisiest neighbors within the nearest ten miles?

It doesn’t seem to matter if I stay in a hotel, a motel, an AirBnB or on a friend’s fold-away couch. Somehow noisy people always manage to find me. Somebody nearby always wants to feed a crying baby at 2:00 am, have a dance party, practice the trumpet from midnight to dawn, watch late-night TV at full volume — or have fabulous sex. Why me?

So here I am, up in Reno, Nevada, in a fleabag motel, with what appears to be Prom Night going on in the room next door. How am I ever going to manage to get to sleep tonight — let alone dream.

And speaking of dreaming, acclaimed author William Kent Krueger just won an award for best murder-mystery novel of 2018 at the convention I’m attending here. His book, “Sulfer Springs,” deals with the horrors that immigrants to our southern borders have to go through just to stay alive.

“This is the first book I’ve ever written that has generated hate mail,” said Krueger. Why am I not surprised. Coming to America used to be a good thing — but now apparently it is a crime.

All the parts of America today that are wonderful have been built on the backs of immigrants — be they Native Americans, African slaves, Asians, Aztecs, Pilgrims or whoever. All of our ancestors had dreams. They all were dreamers. They all came here to follow their dreams. We Americans are all descended from dreamers.

And who is to say that Latino dreams are worse or less important or different or more inferior than the dreams of our ancestors?

Had it been possible 2000 years ago, Jesus would have immigrated to America as well. Jesus was a dreamer too. “Take up your cross and follow me,” Jesus said. Who knows? He might have led us to El Paso or San Diego or Arizona if Jesus had been alive today. But Jesus never ever said anything about building a Border Wall to keep the Samaritans out. That is more like something Judas would do.

Jesus was a dreamer, our ancestors were dreamers and I am a dreamer too — that is if I can ever manage to fall asleep up here in Reno.

I’m up here in Reno Nevada right now, attending a convention of murder-mystery writers and readers — and guess what? I’m actually going to speak at an authors’ discussion panel this Friday. So exciting! It’s like unexpectedly winning the jackpot on a slot machine. Not something that happens every day. http://www.leftcoastcrime.org/2018/Panels.html#Friday

The subject of my talk will be my latest detective novel, “Road Trip to Damascus”. It’s awesome. And, knowing me, you can probably guess who the villain might be. Spoiler alert: It’s the CIA. https://www.amazon.com/Road-Trip-Damascus-Jane-Stillwater/dp/1548204730

But speaking of winning and losing, America is currently being run by the biggest bunch of losers on the planet. Boy, would I love to speak on a panel discussion about them — hopefully on CNN but I’d even settle for Fox News. However, nobody in my country seems to want to hear about America’s Biggest Losers. And of course I’m talking about President Donald Trump and friends. Trump’s list of BFFs reads like a murder-mystery too — or actually more like a horror story. Let’s just take a look:

First let’s consider Trump himself. The man thrives on chaos — but unfortunately the rest of us do not. And then there’s Vice President Pence, who appears to want to put every woman in America into cages and only allow us out to give birth and dust furniture. Happy Women’s History Month to us. We’ll soon be back in the Dark Ages if Pence gets his way.

And apparently Trump’s perspective National Security Advisor John Bolton has plans to make us all so secure that our coffins will fit us just right. Secretary of State nominee Pompeo has wet dreams of starting a nuclear war with (fill in the blank). Secretary of Defense Mattis thinks that the best defense for America is to get us all killed so we won’t have to worry about surviving World War 3 any more. https://www.commondreams.org/news/2018/03/16/warnings-civilization-threatening-disaster-john-bolton-tops-list-mcmaster

Trump’s nominee for the head of the CIA, Gina Haspel, is addicted to torture. Hope you haven’t had a mani-pedi lately because there goes your nails. She’s the kind of bad guy I wrote about in my murder-mystery — and she could be coming to your town soon too.
https://readersupportednews.org/opinion2/277-75/49039-focus-gina-haspel-should-be-in-the-dock-at-the-hague

United Nations ambassador Haley appears to have totally dedicated her life to murdering every single Syrian still left alive — and she knows how to lie, cheat and steal to get the job done too, is even far better at it than Colin Powell was regarding WMDs in Iraq. Will she be coming after us next as well? Lie down with dogs, get up with fleas. http://www.newsweek.com/now-mattis-admits-there-was-no-evidence-assad-using-poison-gas-his-people-801542

But Trump’s most scary Besties of all are Israel and Saudi Arabia. Everyone knows that the Saudis cut off people’s heads and fund ISIS — and yet Trump asks them to the freaking White House for dinner and friends them on FaceBook and Twitter.

And the stuff of nightmares that Israeli neo-cons have happily perpetrated in Gaza makes my blood curl. And yet the monsters responsible for creating the worst concentration camp since Auschwitz are all Trump’s BFFs. Why is it that liberals hate, hate, hate Trump but love, love, love his BFF Israel? Can’t they see the connection? I’ll never be able to figure that one out. Still a mystery to me. https://www.ucpress.edu/book.php?isbn=9780520295711

But right now I just want to forget about all the horror that lies ahead of us — like the rest of America surely has. Right now all I want to do is go lose a few dollars on the penny slots and then take a nap. Wake me up when America finally comes to its senses (or else in time for dinner, whichever comes first). But clearly I have far more chance of winning big bucks on the penny slots here in Reno than America has of winning ANYTHING while being led into total chaos by Washington’s biggest losers.

PS: Although Trump always touts himself as the owner of Casino America, in reality he’s not even a pit boss — more like a wannabe blackjack dealer on the graveyard shift.

Then who exactly are America’s true casino owners and high rollers? The Deep State? The military-industrial complex that eats its young? The neo-con Israel lobby? The wolves of Wall Street? The dark money behind Citizens United? We may never know. The only thing that we do know for certain is that it ain’t you or me — and it’s definitely not Donald Trump.

So. When are Americans going to finally stop wasting their money by playing at Casino America — where all the decks are stacked against us?

Author’s note:  If you haven’t already noticed by now, I truly do dislike Israeli neo-colonialists and Saudi neo-colonialists.  Hell, I don’t even like American neo-colonialists.   Why can’t everybody just stay home where they belong!  And also how come  everyone gets on my case for calling out Israelis and Saudis — but if I  were to lie through my teeth about Russia, Syria, Iran or North Korea, I’d get all kinds of applause?  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ziAK91AEEl8&feature=youtu.be

According to Lt. General Richard Clark, U.S. ground troops are now “prepared to die for the Jewish [sic] state”. https://www.mintpressnews.com/israel-us-operation-juniper-cobra-a-harbinger-of-war-on-syria-hezbollah/238768/

Too late, General Clark! Lots of American soldiers have already died for Israel.

For instance, just ask Joe Meadors, a survivor of the Israeli attack on the USS Liberty back in 1967. After nine hours of surveillance on the hapless ship, Israeli fighter jets then continuously bombed and strafed the USS Liberty while Israeli torpedo boats opened fire on it. This deadly bombardment lasted more than an hour, killing 34 American military personnel and ripping two rather large American flags into shreds. https://www.seattletimes.com/seattle-news/deadly-attack-on-uss-liberty-gets-new-attention/

And then there’s Iraq. 4,424 American soldiers died there. According to US Senator Ernest Hollings back in the day, “With Iraq no threat, why invade a sovereign country? The answer: President Bush’s policy to secure Israel.” https://theshalomcenter.org/node/621

And then there is Syria. American soldiers have been keeping Israeli neo-colonialists’ irons in the fire there since 2011. We’ll never know how many American soldiers have died there. And we’ll never be allowed to know either. https://www.thenation.com/article/bulking-up-on-special-operations-forces-in-2018-will-not-stop-terrorism/

So, yeah. American soldiers have already been dying for “the Jewish state” — or at least for Israeli neo-colonialists’ lust for power in the Middle East.

Civilian Americans have also died recently when a pedestrian bridge collapsed in Miami. America seems to have no money left to repair its infrastructure — but there’s still lots of money left to get American soldiers killed in the Middle East. Israeli neo-colonialists must be totally happy that this is still a thing, still a trend.

So. What does all this “Dying for Israel” fad have to do with little old me? Am I being anti-Semitic? Nah, I’m just still pissed off that Israeli thugs threw me out of Palestine last September. “We are trying to keep Israel safe,” they said. What? Huh? Safe from ME? https://jpstillwater.blogspot.com/2017/09/grilled-my-experience-at-israeli-border.html

PS: When I toured the Senate and House chambers on Capitol Hill the other day, I forgot to ask all those war-mongering lawmakers if they too were willing to “Die for Israel”. But apparently not. Apparently it’s okay for others to “Die for Israel” — but not them. They gotta stay alive and well so they can still get their dark-money campaign contributions from the Israelis and the Saudis (not from the Russians BTW).

_____________________________

Stop Wall Street and War Street from destroying our world. And while you’re at it, please buy my books. https://www.amazon.com/Jane-Stillwater/e/B00IW6O1RM

“Hello, Homeland Security? This is Jane Stillwater. I’m in Washington DC right now and just overheard someone plotting to blow up the whole freaking world. If you don’t stop them right now, America could be end up as a NUCLEAR WASTELAND!” I screamed into the phone. https://www.strategic-culture.org/news/2018/02/18/us-is-executing-global-war-plan.html

“Calm down, lady. Just tell us what you heard.”

“Some dude who identified himself with the obvious code name of ‘Lt. General Richard Clark’ was talking about plans for a false-flag operation that involved blowing up parts of Syria, Lebanon, Iran and Gaza — murdering children, targeting civilians! It was horrible! You MUST do something to stop him!” https://www.mintpressnews.com/israel-us-operation-juniper-cobra-a-harbinger-of-war-on-syria-hezbollah/238768/

“Ma’am, we have no control over what happens outside of America. Plus you could be just imagining all this.” Calling me crazy, is he? Well, I’ll show him!

“The dude actually said with his mouth that the intention of all these attacks was to vilify Russia and China, enough to get them all pissed off and into a shooting war. But it’s not NICE to piss off Mother Russia! Then some other dude talked about being in cahoots with Ukraine neo-Nazi bad guys with a plan in place to blow up Russian-speaking Donbas! You’ve got to stop these people before Russia finally loses patience with the idiots in Washington and drops nuclear bombs on us in return! Please!” https://www.globalresearch.ca/russia-warns-us-against-attacking-syrian-forces/5631930

I also tried to tell DHS how I overheard the king of Saudi Arabia plotting to send whole planeloads of gold bullion to buy off Congress (again) so that the Saudis could continue to massacre Yemeni babies at will — without any tiresome meddling by stupid American busybodies still tied down with the lead weight of conscience. And also how the evil Saudi neo-colonialists were in league with the evil Israeli neo-colonialists in their plot to steal everything in the Middle East that wasn’t tied down and then become a super-power themselves — with America in the role of the red-headed stepchild. http://therealnews.com/t2/story:21264:Gideon-Levy:-The-Zionist-Tango:-Step-Left,-Step-Right

But the Homeland Security guy hung up on me.

So much for “See something, say something.” Humph.

PS: Other than the fact that Washington DC is the home of a bunch of feral idiots who risk American lives daily in their insane quest for diabolical power, the District of Columbia itself is a wonderful place. I got to tour the Senate, the House of Representatives, the International Spy Museum, the National Portrait Gallery, the Library of Congress and the Supreme Court — and also attended a hope-inspiring rally and march staged by Hasidic Jews in protest of Israeli corruption and war-mongering.
https://www.thestar.com/opinion/star-columnists/2018/03/13/instead-of-being-in-jail-haspel-is-cia-director.html

The National Portrait Gallery had an excellent and intimate exhibit of the writing of Sylvia Plath. Fascinating and tragic at the same time. And I almost got thrown out of the Gallery itself by some irate docent when I tried to cut in line to see the new portrait of Michelle Obama. But I got my revenge. I bought the postcard instead and took a selfie with it.

“150 people are standing in line to see Michelle’s portrait right now,” I said to one of the guards there. “I wonder how many people will stand in line to see a portrait of Melania.” The guard and I both laughed. But actually, it’s not Melania’s fault that Americans are more interested in Stormy Daniels than they are in her.

Hell, Americans are far more interested in Stormy Daniels than even in the fact the the power-mad idiots in Washington are trying to blow us all up. But at least some of the DC Metro stations I rode through are far enough underground to serve as bomb shelters. I wonder if I should start building a bomb shelter too when I get home. Couldn’t hurt, might help.